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male
,
anonymous
writes: Since splitting with my girlfriend 4 months ago I have posted on here often and have had some great help and advice. We are going away with my parents to the most romantic part of Italy on Tuesday 20th June which was planned before we split. Since we have split we have met up for a few drinks and a chat, but it has gone no further than this. It appears since we split my ex has been friendly with a guy she used to work with. I have quizzed her about how serious things are and she admitted she has kissed him but thats as far as it has gone and that they are good mates. Im hoping on this holiday that I can maybe get our relationship back on track. Im a little unsure how to go about this. ie. What to say, when to say it and what actions to take etc. Any advice would be really appreciated because I would give anything to have her back in my life.
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female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (16 June 2006):
 Why did you break up? Was it mutual, or one-sided? Are the problems that led to the breakup now solved?
If you can show her that the reasons that you broke up have been fixed, and you have enough history since then to show that they're solved for good, then you may have a chance.
But don't try to 'sneak' back into a relationship, as if you think you can fool her into loving you again by making crafty plans and having her fall into your trap. It sounds to me like you think that simply being in a "romantic part of Italy" is going to make her woozy with romance, and fall into your embrace. But it won't happen if you don't let her know what's on your mind. For heaven's sake, involve her in the discussions, or you'll never get anywhere.
When next you see her -- be it in Italy or at home -- talk to her and tell her that you believe that the problems you had have been solved. Show her the evidence that it has, or at least talk about why you think so. Ask her if she'd reconsider and give you another chance together.
In the final analysis, the ball is always going to be in her court. You present your case, and maybe she gives the two of you another chance, or maybe not. It was ever thus with broken relationships, where one party wants to get back togehter.
Good luck, though.
A
female
reader, ×KiTTy× +, writes (15 June 2006):
Hi,you cant sit around and wait for everything to fall in place,it wont happen.Tell her that you still like her and would love to fix things.u havent said wheter she is still going with you to italy.if so act all romeo be romantic.good luck
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A
male
reader, Lostandalone  +, writes (15 June 2006):
 Man thats a tough one. Make her remember why she fell in love with you in the first place. Let her know that you haven't changed and neither has your love. Do the things that you know she likes and some new things that you think she would like. Show her you and other sides of you that she didn't know existed. Make her feel like the only woman in the world. Be everything that she wants and more. You have to go balls to the wall. Whatever you do be honest and make her believe you. Just don't seem desperate that is a real turn-off. I hope this helps. Good Luck.
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