A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I'm poor. I don't have a cent to my name, and have been trying to get a job to have income for the past three months. I have a boyfriend and he always seems to have plenty of money. I am with him because i love him deeply (not for money... he never buys me anything btw ok so thats obviously not why im with him lol) - but is it ok of me to ask him if he would buy a hamster for me? I don't want him thinking badly of me - It would be amazing to have one though. would it be wrong of me to ask him if he would??
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female
reader, RedAthena +, writes (23 August 2011):
 Chigirl nailed the perfect answer.
If you do not have the means to care for the animal, then you are not ready for the hamster anyway.
Animals never make good gifts.
Bf's are not gift giving vending machines. If he gives you a gift, it should be from his heart; not because you asked.
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (23 August 2011):
 If you don't have the money to buy a hamster you certainly do not have the money to keep a hamster alive and well. So, it's a bad idea, for the hamsters sake, and quite selfish. Sorry to be so blunt. But an animal needs food, health care (yes, hamsters can get sick and need a veterinarian too), toys, equipment that you need to buy over and over (each time you clean the cage).
You're asking for a lot more than just an item you know, a hamster is a live creature. The hamster itself costs WAY less than it costs to keep it alive and well.
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A
female
reader, chocoholicforever +, writes (23 August 2011):
No don't ask your bf to buy you a hamster. Not only is it inappropriate to ask him to give you money (which is essentially what this is), but even if he buys you a hamster how will you afford the other things that the hamster will need - like food, bedding, toys, vet bills. Adopting a pet is an ongoing responsibility. You're responsible for another life, another sentient being. If you're not financially able to afford a hamster on your own, then you're not ready for one yet. it's unfair to ask your bf to take on that burden for you and it could lead to a slippery slope: if he buys you a hamster because you asked him to, then finds has to spend more and more money on your hamster like for vet bills and food, this can lead to resentment in the relationship because he might feel taken advantage of. And then what if you were to break up, who gets the hamster? If he's financially supporting the hamster, then technically it's his pet not yours. So wait until you have enough money to afford a hamster on your own.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 August 2011): If you haven't the means to support yourself, how do you plan to support a hamster?
I'd hold off on getting any animal friends until you can provide for one.
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A
male
reader, Red Green 0289 +, writes (23 August 2011):
No, go ahead and ask, just know that he has the right to say no.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 August 2011): If you weren't asking for something alive I think it would be fine. But a hamster will need a cage and food for the duration of its life, so unless you're going to get him to pay for those things too, indefinitely, I would say ask for something that is a one-time expense. Or wait until you have a job and then get a hamster when you yourself can provide for it. Good luck.
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