A
female
age
30-35,
*bedoll
writes:well me and my boyfriend are going to be 2 years together already and i dont know why but he has changed with me a lot! Before he used to call me lots of times, we used to talk like for 3 hours sometimes i had to even take my phone to the restroom even when i was gonna take a shower he didnt even let me eat and we used to text 24/7, and now he doesnt even bother on calling me or texting me at all, now im the one that wants to talk to him and he ignores me.I call him and he doesnt answer or i text him and doesnt reply back and im already tired of this. i have asked him lots of times to be honest with me if he still wants to be with me and he says he still wants to be with and that he's not going to hurt me that its me the one that gets stupid things in my head but how does he expect me not to think about those things if he dosent call me? I need someone to tell me what to do so he can miss me and call me the way he used to... help me please
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female
reader, petina1  +, writes (28 November 2010):
 When two people get together in the early days it's called the 'honeymoon' period. Lots of conversation, flirting, texting, calls etc. But eventually this will die down. It's usually because you are more comfortable with each other. The relationship settles more. You know you are both there but you don't need to live in each others pockets. Some people can continue this line of texting etc usually it can be one way because they don't trust the person and they are checking up on them. If everything else with you is okay then I wouldnt worry too much. He may be a bit fed up with the amount of times you call , he may be doing other things that you are stopping him from doing, interupting his day etc. If you can rule out another girlfriend then I wouldnt worry about anything else. If you want him to miss me, give him enough time to miss you. Don't call him first. See how long he can go before he misses you and let him call first.
A
female
reader, pixiegirls +, writes (28 November 2010):
 Many relationships in the beginning involve constant texting, emails, or phone calls. This is especially common during the first three months, also called the "honeymoon" period. It is a way of getting to know someone and let the other person know you think about them and are truly interested. It is a highly charged infatuation period. For some it may last three months, for others, six months or more.
Commonly, as the honeymoon phase dies down, both people usually decide if the relationship going to a different level is worth pursuing. As you relationship continues to grow, and you both become more settled in the relationship, know more about each other, and are more comfortable and secure in the relationship, the amount of texting, or communication will also decrease from the amount you were used to in the beginning of the relationship. This does not mean that the other person wants out or cares any less for you; it is a normal part of a growing relationship. After the honeymoon phase, a deeper and more secure sense of love and caring develop. The need for constant reassurance should not be needed at this point in the relationship. Receiving text messages or other contact from our mates once or twice a day when a relationship has continued for some time as yours, is not uncommon. In fact, it is a sign that you have trust and security in the relationship without requiring constant reassurance.
Women typically analyze and pay attention to the amount of texts, emails, and phone calls they receive from their boyfriends than men do. This is our nature. It is when we over-analyze, become obsessed, and begin to question our boyfriends incessantly that problems will arise. It may look to your boyfriend that you are being too needy or clingy dwelling on how many times he texts you or answers you, and may push him away further or wish to end the relationship. Asking if he doesn’t want to be with you all the time may also just become too much, where he gives you an answer you don’t want.
It does sound like you may not be giving your boyfriend the chance to reach out first to text or call you. Your fear of him wanting to end the relationship may become real if you continue to push him into a corner. As hard as it may be for you, do not text or call him, but wait for him to be able to miss you and want to talk to you. Since it is you who is always the one to send a text or to call, why should he bother? This takes away from him having a chance to want to call or text you. It would be unrealistic to think that you can go back to the 24/7 communication you did in the beginning of your relationship, but see this as a good thing. Not needing those continuous texts and calls, shows that the relationship has grown to a deeper level.
If you feel that you are having difficulty with “not” sending any texts, emails, or calling him, get a journal, or a notebook, for yourself only. Write down your fears and feelings instead of caving in and contacting him first again. This allows you to vent your frustrations without causing damage to your relationship in appearing clingy and obsessive. This is never an attractive quality. Try to see yourself in his shoes. Would you want a boyfriend who was always contacting you, feeling insecure, and repeatedly asking if you still wanted to be with them? Most likely not.
We all want those great relationships in our lives, but we want them to be without drama, insecurities, or questioning everything we do in them. A solid relationship is one that is honest and allows trust in the other person to thrive. Feeling secure about yourself first, and not relying on someone else to make you feel that way is the strongest and best gift you can bring into a relationship. Nothing can kill a relationship faster than neediness, accusations, and obsessiveness.
So give your boyfriend a little breathing room, let him know you are not dependent upon him to make you happy or occupy your time. Go out with some girlfriends for some fun; spend more time on a hobby, journal if that helps. You will show a more attractive side of yourself by showing you are not dependent or needy…I guarantee this. Do not become frantic about how much time it takes to receive a response from a message. Do not think if you have not heard from your boyfriend in a day or two that it is an indication he wants out. Most of all, allow time (even days) for your boyfriend to miss the texts and phone calls, and want to really talk to you. You will be surprised at how backing off results in your boyfriend being the one to contact you.
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