A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I'm in college, and one of my best (guy) friends (lets call him andrew) from here, his hometown is about three hours away. When I went to visit andrew a year ago I met all of his friends and we hung out the whole weekend. Then, about 6 months ago, one of his friends started planning a surprise trip, so all of andrew's friends from home could surprise him at college and spend the weekend. So me and andrew's friend started planning this trip and have been talking ever since. we text and chat on facebook constantly. I've met him in person only three times but I really like him, and so i've heard he really likes me too. I know this is kind of weird because we dont REALLY know eachother but for some reason I have really stron feelings for him. What I need help with, is that Andrew and I are going down to his friend's college next weekend to hang out with him. How do I play this? we've already established that we're sharing a bed (due to space issues with others coming that weekend)I really like him, but don't want to be too forward, and he is kind of shy with girls (or so my friend says). I don't know how to act towards him when I get there and how far to go with him once i'm there, and how he feels about it. I am also worried because he likes this other girl (he hasnt told me but i'm assuming, they flirt a lot and stuff) and she will be at the party. I want him to like me more than her. i know i sound ridiculous right now but i just want this to work out. what should i do?
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female
reader, Piepie +, writes (16 September 2011):
First off, just be yourself and don't stress about it. I know it's hard to keep your cool and remain collected sometimes but if you’re in a bad mental state you might be unknowingly throwing bad vibes his way and that might turn him off. Secondly, don't be pushy, he’s shy. You don't want him running away because you keep asking him something that makes him uncomfortable like if he thinks you’re cute. Thirdly, have class. You don't have to throw yourself at him for him to like you. Fourthly, find your common ground and maintain it. Obviously you two have talked before and you should know a little bit about him. Try to relate to him by talking about things you know that interest him but don't make it awkward for yourself by trying too hard or by bringing up something he has no interest in. Fifthly, be personable, he’s probably looking for someone he can get along well with. This ties in with being yourself, being pushy, and finding common ground. Don't give him the cold shoulder, it will hurt his pride and change the way he thinks of you. Sixthly, talk but don't speak. How many times have you heard it’s all in the eyes or so and so is checking you out. A person can say a lot without opening their mouth so give him a look or two and use your body language. Seventh, no cat fights. You don't want drama 'cause that just makes things worse and after all you have the bed right? Eighth, don’t compare yourself to her. You will never be her and she will never be you. Comparing yourselves is not going to change the way he thinks of either of you. You are your own unique individual and if he doesn’t like you for who you are, you need to move on. Lastly, go with the flow. Life is any easier pill to swallow if you don't fight it. If it's meant to be then it's meant to be and if it's not, it's not. Just remember to be yourself and have fun, and it will work itself out. :)
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 September 2011): All you can do is just be yourself, friendly, flirty, and you don't have to be "forward," but just be the person that he says he likes. But you will know if he likes you a lot vs. just as a friend. His body language will be pretty clear on that once you get there.
Really there is no way to get him to like you more if he already likes her more. Maybe he's a flirt, or maybe he really likes that girl. Only time will tell.
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