A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:here goes.........I have known this guy since november, he is a farmer and lives in the valley where i work. i run into him on a daily basis, we meet up nearly every night, and share hobbies at the weekends. we are so made for each other and are head over heels in love. problem is he has a live in girlfriend of 4 years. they have nothing in common and neither of them are happy. he thinks that i am his perfect girl (in his words "the kind i always dreamed of having") and he knows that we would have such a great life together. He is afraid to break it off with her as he doesn't want to hurt her and watch her have to pack her things and leave. (its his farmhouse)He says if there is any way it could be made easier or something, he would do it without hesitation.I AM CRAZY FOR THIS GUY. HE IS ONE IN A MILLION, KIND, GENTLEMANLY, GORGEOUS (BLONDE!!!) AND I WANT TO SPEND THE REST OF MY LIFE WITH HIM.i'm not out to break them up on a whim or to get back at anyone, simply for true love.WHAT CAN HE DO TO BREAK IT OFF GENTLY?PLEASE PLEASE HELP ME. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (30 March 2011):
 See this is the problem, if he actually cared about you and was in love with YOU, he would be the one coming on here to ask this question, not you. Or better yet, he would have broken up with her already.
It's not that hard to break it off with someone. It can take time to gather up the courage, but if he was telling you the truth, and they both actually are miserable, it wouldn't be that difficult.
I don't think this man is telling you the truth. You are head over heels for him, and he might be in love with you as well. But some things don't add up. First off all, if his relationship wasn't a good one he would have left, before he even met you. Second, after falling in love with you he would have certainly left, as any decent man would have done. He shows a lack of backbone and honor by stringing his live-in girlfriend, and you, along like this.
Third, it really isn't that hard to leave someone who you have a miserable relationship with. Which is why this is suspicious.
"they have nothing in common and neither of them are happy."
That's the most common line in the world of cheaters it's hardly funny even. If they had nothing in common he would have left, if they weren't happy even she would have left. They could have even broken it off and her still living with him without them being a couple, if finding a new place to live is SO difficult.
Don't let this guy get to you unless he gets single and his gf moves out. Until he gets single, he's all talk and no action, and you really can not trust what he says.
Remember that this shows his character! This isn't just about you and him, this is something that defines who he is. He is the type of man who while in a relationship flirts with other girls, while in a relationship he seduces other girls, and tells them the things he's been telling you. He's the type of guy that can string his girlfriend along to believe they have a happy and good relationship, all the while he goes behind her back and tells his girls on the side how "horrible" he's got it.
You just can't trust that. A decent man wouldn't say such things, a decent man would break it off if he's having a horrible time in his relationship, or work on his relationship. A decent man, or person for that matter, would not flirt with other girls, or start a new relationship, before he's finished with the first relationship.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 March 2011): I'm assuming from the fact he has a house and live-in girlfriend, he is an adult. You are a kid. Not only is he using you, but he's also a pedophile. Stay away from him.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (29 March 2011):
He's using you. He can dump her any time he likes, and if he loved you he would have dumped her some time ago. But he's not doing it, and instead of being a gentleman and kind, as you suggest, he's lying and cheating.
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