A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:hi i have been with my boyfriend for 7/half months. im 19 hes 24 and still lives with his parents, ive mentioned that we get our own flat but he puts it off, he doesnt even have a job. its seems that he wont help himself, he recently passed his drivivg test but cant afford to get on the road as he hasnt got any insurance on his car. im sick of nagging him, how can i pursuade him to do something with his life without nagging like move in together as i still live at home with my mother and she has another baby on the way pls help. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, iagirl  +, writes (12 December 2007):
 The simple answer is, you can't. You can't change someone no matter how much you "nag" or how much you love them. If he doesn't want to get his act together for himself, then he most definitely won't do it for you. I have to ask you though, why would you want to move in with somebody who has no job, no car, and no ambition in life? You can do better!
A
female
reader, BellyDance  +, writes (12 December 2007):
 Well don't feel bad because you live at home with your mom. You are 19, fresh out of highschool...or in your last year(Europe?). Your b/f is 24 and thats the difference. You say he doesn't have a job either? How long has he been without a job? Are you paying for everything when it comes to dates? I think most females want a guy who has a back bone and has somewhere he wants to go in life. A good thing would be something he can call his own accomplishment and not something given to him by his mom. He sounds like he really likes living at home with his parents. I wouldn't worry too much him moving out, but more about the job and car thing. If he can at least establish some type of independence at 24 then thats a plus.
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