A
female
age
30-35,
*uro9
writes:I met a guy last summer, and we soon became good friends. He began to like me, but I only liked him for about a week, because I was confused over my feelings. Eventually I began to feel awkward, and I began to avoid him, so we stopped talking for a few months. At that time, I also got involved in a relationship with another guy. We began talking, though, a few months later, soon after my ex broke up with me (he didn't know I broke up with him until after we started talking). He didn't believe he would, but he began to like me again, and I started to like him also, except I was unsure. He asked me out about a month or two after we began talking again, but I said no because I was afraid of getting into a relationship. He told me that he would wait for me, and I told him that I appreciated this. Last night, I actually got into a deep conversation about that with him, and I told him that I was also sort of shaky because of my last relationship. I also told him that there were times that I thought of him as a brother (stupid move, I know.), but still he told me that he would wait for me. I still told him again (I told him this numerous times in the past), that he could take any opportunity with a girl that liked him, because I felt selfish that I was keeping him waiting this long (I was reassured by his claims that he wouldn't, so I didn't think that we would actually do this). But still, he told me he would wait for me and when I was ready to get into a relationship. I did show him my gratitude. Well, today he went to the pool with another girl that has liked him for a while; she's a year older, and he always told me that he didn't like her back. But then when I was talking to him online today, he told me that he made out with her. Honestly, I was crushed, and somewhat angry at him, and I knew that I was, and that I was crying. He told me he felt horrible, and that he knew he lied to me and that this fact disturbed him. Just by knowing him this long, I know he wouldn't lie about his emotions like that. But then he said that I'm not ready for a relationship, and that the girl that he made out with is a year older and is very experienced with them, and so that he might date her. He did say he still has feelings for me though, but that he wanted us to explore new opportunities so that in the future we would be ready for one. He said that he wanted to change for the better, also. I realize that I want him back badly now though, and although we both still act like best friends, I don't know what to do, or how to act to get him to want to go out with me again. Please give me advice, I'd really appreciate it.
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female
reader, iwillhelpyouthroughit  +, writes (30 June 2007):
 bless you
it reli looks liek your goin through a bad tym
i think that you should tell him how you are feeling
wot have you got to lose i mean
i think that you should tlk to him upfront about it tell him you miss him and how upset you were
and sorry about in the past how you are not ready for a relationship
i would do it if i were you
you could lose him forever and never no wot myt of happened betweens you's
xxxx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 June 2007): Everything...I mean EVERYTHING in life happens for a reason. Don't fall into the needy woman role. Let him fall in love with you because you're strong, smart and have goals in life besides figuring out how to make him want you exclusively! It doesn't mean that what happens to you won't hurt, it's a proven fact... through hurt we tend to grow up and change.
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