A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:hi i just met a new man and we started to date he wants to be with me and i want to be with him.Problem is he has alot of friends and go out every weekend plus works long hours all week. he wants me to go out with his friends as well but i cant always afford to do that.I would like us to have time alone together. i told him all this and he said his friends are important he does see them all the time and not to worry about money and things we cross that bridge when we come to it. i just hope we get time alone together sometimes. what do i do? he is loving and shows me affection.
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (17 October 2012):
 have you ASKED him where you fit with him?
if he's asking you to go out with his couple friends... that's a good thing... do you two get ANY alone time?
if not you could ask him why...
how long have you been dating?
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2012): he said i can go he wants to take me out with all his mates who are male and female. most are couples anyway. i just think he has too many friends and we never will have time alone together?
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A
female
reader, Aunty Audrey  +, writes (17 October 2012):
 He's too social right now and he's not as serious about you as you would like to think.
How do I know this? Because if you really were his number one priority then his friends would take a back seat.
He gets more pleasure from his friends and from interacting with his friends and boasting and postureing and showing off in front of his friends.
Taking second place is not the way a man treats a woman he adores and cherishes and wants to be with.
Besides a man who is really serious and ready to settle down the man will choose activities that are suitable for him to take his new girlfriend alone. Invite his girlfriend to meet his friends. Invite his girlfriend to attend family events. And consider his girlfriend.
And I imagine that he already has a settled life. So why can't he help out with the cost of these outings so that you can attend
Long term though, if you were married to this man, could you endure a marriage where he he still went on spending huge amounts on his own activities with his friends? It could become a problem of financial priorities in the future in any relationship.
Long term it may be several years before he may be ready to settle down. And even when he does attempt to settle down he may be a selfish spouse. Is this what you want? Some men never grow up. And want to spend time with their male buddies far more than with the wife they profess to love.
This man may not be the right man for you, long term
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (17 October 2012):
 Ask him for a date-night a week, just the two of you?
I do think his friends have a higher priority then you, I'm afraid. Which is kind of odd considering the relationship is new.
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