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I told my boyfriend I was raped and he says things "don't add up"

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Question - (12 June 2010) 6 Answers - (Newest, 2 January 2012)
A female United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

I was wondering was I raped. Last week, I received a call from an old friend who said that he wanted to talk to me and I told him that we can talk on the phone and he said that he wanted to talk in person. I told him to meet me over a friend house so he did I got in the vehicle with him and he said that we was just going to ride. The ride ended up in a wooded area down the road from his house. I ask me to come over to where he was sitting at in the car in I said no. I came over to where I was and I told him no. I thought that we was just going to talk, then he tried to kiss me n i started moving my face away from his face. Then he starting taking my cloths off and I told him that I wasn't going to have sex with him so I don't know why he brought me out here. Then he forced his self on top on me and I told him to stop that I wanted him to take me back to my car he didn't do that then everything went down. I was crying n didn't enjoy it at all. I told my boyfriend that I been rape at first he believed me and now he telling me that things don't add up. I just don't know what to do.

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A male reader, IHateWomanBeaters United States +, writes (2 January 2012):

IHateWomanBeaters agony aunt If what you are saying is true and no details have been altered, which only you and the guy you are talking about can know for sure, then you were clearly, beyond a reasonable doubt, raped.

Unfortunately, since it is such a severe crime with such a severe penalty, in this case, there needs to be a lot of evidence to back your story up, for the courts. This will not happen, evidence needs to be there, and there isn't, unless you went to the doctor's right after?

What I would do is go to a counselor and, as they said, get some options.

You can get a restraining order against the guy, etc.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (3 July 2010):

That's horrible that that happened to you, I to was raped before and when i told my boyfriend he dumped me.

I think you should tell the police or someone who will help you catch the man who raped you. Or perhaps contacting a help line in you're region would be of help.

And as for you're boyfriend, it' awful of him to say "Things don't ads up.", if you haven't already, you should talk to him more about it.

Good luck.

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A female reader, Carrot2000 United States +, writes (13 June 2010):

Carrot2000 agony auntContact a crisis center; they can explain your options to you.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (12 June 2010):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

thanks for responding to my question at this present time im very clueless or what to do.

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A female reader, person12345 United States +, writes (12 June 2010):

person12345 agony auntAre you going to press charges? I'm sorry your boyfriend is being unsupportive, this must be really hard on you. It's horrible to go through that, worse to have to deal with someone you love not believing you. You should go talk to a counselor or therapist about this. There is also an online rape hotline or a phone rape hotline that can point you in the right direction.

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A female reader, Carrot2000 United States +, writes (12 June 2010):

Carrot2000 agony auntThis guy forced sex on you: you were raped. I'm so sorry this happened to you, and I am sorry your boyfriend is not being supportive. Are you planning to press charges? Whether you do or do not, please contact your local rape crisis center so you can get some counseling and emotional support.

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