A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Im in total devastation I have been with my fiancé 5 years in march.the day before me and him was meant to be moving into our flat together he told me he didnt love me anymore??? I was heart broken and I still am.Then the day after he rang me up crying saying he was so sorry he was just confused about everything and he wanted to try and make it work.So that Saturday we met up and make another go...he told me to move everything into the flat...( he wasnt moving in until the start of april ) as he had to pay he mum the last of the rent for his house.sooo he even bought me food for the month...then a few days later he told me he didnt see it going anywhere..we shared one last night together and then went our separate ways...I thought by giving him space and breaking up it would make he realise what he had,obviously not!!!! i cant get over him at all hes made me so heartbroken,i miss everything about him!!he says he is over me,but I dont believe that!!!!!Ive never been so sad about him...honestly we were the perfect couple,everyone is shocked!! and i just cant get my head round it!!He said it wasnt the fact he didnt wana move it and he scared,coz apparently he wasnt!! the spark had gone and he didnt feel the same anymore!!I really need someones advice on what to do and will he ever see the light?x
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male
reader, scouse +, writes (17 March 2011):
I am really sorry to hear this,obviousy dont know you but i can hear and feel your pain.The unfortunate thing about this is this word called closure.You cant understand why he has ended it and you are desperately searching for this answer or a reason,something you can relate to.You wont find this overnight and it is only time that will sort this out for you.When someone breaks up with their partner,whether male or female just remember this,rarely will they tell you the full truth and that is so very hard because we keep guessing all the time.Right now you must tell yourself that YOU are better then this and deserve better and one day you WILL get better.No words from anyone now will cut much ice,you will miss him and still love him,the previous writer is correct,you have to grieve because grieving is part of the healing process,hope you start to feel better sooner rather then later......Scouse.
A
male
reader, dirtball  +, writes (17 March 2011):
 Will he ever see the light? Depends on which light you're talking about. Perhaps to him, he did see the light, and that's why he broke it off.
I have a feeling he's been considering this for quite some time. It was low of him to get your hopes up and commit to something knowing he wouldn't follow through. Very low indeed.
To get over him, you need to grieve the relationship like you would the death of a loved one. Cut contact and allow yourself to go through the stages. Anger, denial, depression, bargaining and acceptance. It will take some time, but it's always best if you don't try to rekindle things with an ex. 99% of the time, the relationship just ends again, and you've wasted more precious time with someone who you will ultimately not be happy with.
By the way, based on this statement: "he says he is over me,but I dont believe that!!!!!" I'd say you're in the denial stage. I'm sorry this happened to you.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 March 2011): The 'moving in together' obviously focused his thoughts and made him decide on the split. It may be that the committment of moving in together got to him. You must have got together quite young. Maybe he felt he hadn't lived life enough. But honestly, I think you have to face the idea that it is over. You can't get over him, sadly that doesn't mean he feels the same. Anyway, it is a long road, getting over someone you thought was your future. Don't expect you be over it quickly. But once you accept it is really over - you are on the way, time really does help. Get out and about with friends, keep active. You will get over it.
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