A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I met this girl at a mall, and for the first time, i asked a girl for her number, and i succeeded in doing so. We texted each other for a little bit, then, to kinda test her, i didnt text for about 5 days, she texted me back, and she started calling me sweetheart and baby and all these names, and i called her the same things, said she was beautiful, and we were going great, so naturally, because i have never experienced anything like this, i thought i was in a relationship. I changed my relationship status and three days later, she discovered it and she asked "since when were we going out", it absolutely destroyed me, and after thinking about it, i apologized and explained that i never had anything like that in my life, and i was anxious and excited to actually be talking to a girl, she accepted my apology, but i havent really talked to her since, i havent talked to her in about 2 weeks now, and it crosses my mind every day now, i dont know what to do, i want to see her again, and i dont know if a relationship is possible now, but i also dont know how she would react if i did she her again, someone help me
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 October 2010): WOAH..!
You changed your relationship status before asking her to he your girlfriend?
If that was a girl you hardly knew doing that to you, how would you feel?
A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 October 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthe same way she did, i totally understand where your coming from
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A
female
reader, ElectricSheep +, writes (19 October 2010):
 The girl herself started calling him "baby" and "sweetheart" just after 5 days. That gives the idea that they're close, if not in a relationship. I know I call a guy those names only when we're in a relationship. I do agree with Dear Jilly however in that before declaring a relationship, she should have been asked.
You haven't talked to her in two weeks, I'm assuming she hasn't contacted you either. In that case, I think you should let this go. She didn't get back in touch with you which shows she isn't interested. You can try texting her and say you wanted to see how she's doing, and if you get a positive reply back, then maybe you can have another chance.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 October 2010): WOAH..!
You changed your relationship status before asking her to he your girlfriend?
If that was a girl you hardly knew doing that to you, how would you feel?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2010): CHIGIRL..what a lovely reply..he should listen to you! You have it spot on..females love commitment, but not guys who presume a relationship (declare it) before asking.
Keep on track with the gentle pursuing, romance, honesty, loyalty, sincerity..yep, that does it most times!
Jilly
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2010): i'm not sure from your post, but did you actually go on any dates with her, or did you just meet at the mall and text ?. If you haven't actually been on any dates together, then you aren't in a relationship. You are just attracted at the moment. You seem liek a really sweet guy, but it seems as though there has been a misunderstanding here. However, if you have been on a date/dates with her, then i'm not sure why she reacted like that.
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (18 October 2010):
 You need to ask her if she wants to be your girlfriend. At least tell her you want a relationship, you really like her, and ask that she takes the time to get to know you.
Girls love a man who wants to committ. She was simply caught off guard as you moved on WAY too fast, and it sends out creep-wibes. You need to reassure her you are a genuine, albeit lost, man who is sincere.
Maybe text her again and pursue her, and for starters you can ask for friendship? Then after a bit more time tell her you are interested in a relationship.
Things that catch a girls eye: honesty, sincerity, loyalty, romance. She was probably starting to fall for you, but you pushed her away with declaring you were an item without asking her first. Next time ask the other person if they want to be exclusive with you before you announce it. But she fell for you once, she can do it again. Just give it another shot.
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