A
male
age
26-29,
*snoneemuss
writes:There's this girl that I have a bit of a history with (albeit a couple of make out sessions a long time ago) and we both wanted to go to a theme park, and so we went; as friends. At first we got on well with conversation flowing, and then when we came up to the first ride she held my hand. After this I took that as a sort of go ahead and she instigated a lot of physical contact like leaning against me, hugging and more hand holding. She was constantly saying how this was the best day she has had in a long time, and there was never any awkward moments, I felt that this had gone swimmingly and started to have strong feelings for her. When we went our separate ways home, we had one last hug and she leant in for a kiss, which whilst was only short, was very intimate. I wake up thinking she may want a relationship and to take things further only to find she has blocked me on facebook and is shutting me out. I can't think of any reason why she has done this and won't reply to my texts, I don't know what to do. Is there any reason she has done this and what should i do now?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 July 2014): People do this sometimes. (Notice I didn't say girls, because boys do it just as much.) Any guesses as to why it happened in any specific situation is just that, a wild guess.
The only thing you can do is stop trying to communicate with her. Obviously she doesn't want to talk to you right now. The more you try, the more you push her away. Leave her alone now, and maybe someday she'll decide to reach out to you again.
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (13 July 2014):
 Eh yes, do not be too upset, these sort of things happen, and they happen a lot in your ( and her ) age range.
She had a good time with you, she was enjoying herself that day- and maybe she is the flirty/ cuddly / tactile tyoe that can get you a bit confused,- then again, a good day at the rides AS FRIENDS does not mean that she wants to have a r/ship with you, or come out on dates with you, or even that she is stil attracted to you.
Now, the PC thing would have been for her to tell you " Sorry John, you are good company and I had a great time the other day, yet I don't feel this may be going anywhere as more than strictly friends, blah blah blah ". But, this takes poise, guts and maturity even for grown up people, doling out rejection is often as awkward and unpleaant as getting rejected, so... she panicked and took the easy way out : blocking you.
I'd let her be, and try to take it with philosophy, of course if you nag and pester eventually you may get your official explanation and maybe even apologies, but... what would be the point . The end result is still, she is not having it. So , might as well being a good sport- and moving on to some other girl hoping to have better luck.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2014): She had a good day, but that doesn't mean she wants to make you her boyfriend.
She is only around 16. At that age, a girl's feelings are all over the place. She may have been trying to be nice to you, but she felt you were getting too close and falling for her. She doesn't want you to be more than a friend. You are trying to ignore that fact.
When girls suddenly shut you out without an explanation; it usually means they met another guy they like better. When she hung-out with you, she may have been deciding which of the two guys she likes best. To be honest, everything she did that you described in your post is just what girls do with friends. The kiss was short for a reason.
You're a nice boy, but she may have decided to be with another guy. She had to stop you from contacting her,to just remain a friend. She was afraid to say it to your face and hurt your feelings.
She could see on the day you were together, you weren't going to be easy to tell she only wants to be friends with you, but she wants to see other boys.
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A
male
reader, Mark1978 +, writes (13 July 2014):
 Oh dear. We have all had this happen at some point. Date goes well, we kiss, we cuddle, we get excited and then BAM! they either completely ignore us or tell us some crap about being busy, having met someone, blah, blah.
As for what you did wrong, well its hard to tell without actually being there. It may be that she was trying hard to be impressive and polite and didn't want to be seen as a bore and therefore went through the motions and decided you wasn't for her and blocked you. It may be that she does that to men a lot as a kind of game or ego boost...some people like to be taken on dates and get the ego stroking of attention and a kiss and cuddle and then ignore the other person completely afterwards out of spite or insecurity.
One thing that could be causing an issue: you say you went to the theme park just as friends and ended up kissing. Maybe she went along thinking it would just be friends and then felt bad afterwards that she had gone too far with someone she only saw as a friend?
Its better in the long run to go on DATES with a girl you like, as doing things as FRIENDS can cause confusion and make people unsure as to what's being offered. Plus a restaurant or drinks or something may be a better bet for a first date than a theme park. A friend of mine went on a date to Alton Towers years ago, and went on one of those big roller coaster things that I am far too fill your underwear scared to go on. He got on trying to impress his date and get a bit intimate...then threw up and it splatter on his dates face!
Put it down to experience. Move on and find someone else.
Mark
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A
male
reader, killer bee  +, writes (13 July 2014):
 mabey she was following your lead, but realised how fast things were moving and decided to put an end to it cause she may have felt hurt last time things ended and wanted to prevent that feeling. just give her some space and see what hapens.
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