A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I'm talking to this guy and I'm in college. He lives an Hour away but he went back to his original home because he's on vacation. we usually talk everyday, but when I told him I was going home he told me he wont contact me this weekend, so I can spend time with my family. I told him its fine, every time I mention going home he assumes I'm going to do something like cheat even though I'm a virgin.Anyway, I told him its fine I want him to talk to me this weekend and he said NO, he will talk to me on Sunday. I got upset because he always does this and I told him how much I hate that over the weekends he goes MIA but yet he still does it. I said if you wont talk to me until Saturday then just don't contact me period, and he said fine then I guess ill just talk to on Monday. I said whatever he told me he loved me and he was just kidding, he said he'd talk to me over the weekend.When he usually goes MIA over the weekend he calls me Monday morning. Although he said he talk to me over the weekend he didn't I even texted him but no reply.. its now Monday and he still hasn't talked to me.Should I be upset? I always think he's cheating on me. How should I handle the situation when he does call me ?
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male
reader, CMMP +, writes (17 September 2013):
Yeah, the bottom line is that you shouldn't be fawning for a guy who is not even close to giving you what you want.
If you want a relationship and a commitment then expect that from him. If he doesn't live up to your expectations then tell him. If he doesn't do anything (do, not say) to change, then you're with the wrong guy.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 September 2013): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYea your right an although I already knew that I sound like a little girl and show signs of immaturity, It helps so much to actually hear it from someone. Thanks for your help.
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A
female
reader, Denise32 +, writes (17 September 2013):
 Well said, WiseOwlE!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 September 2013): Have you ever met this guy in person? If the two of you are just talking, then he can't possibly be cheating on you when you are not exclusive. Please get a grip. If the two of you have connected on-line and have never met in person and you are calling this a relationship, you are seriously lacking the understanding of what a dating relationship with another person is.Stop playing word games with this person. Say what you mean and mean what you say. If you don't like how this is going for you, why on earth are you hanging on? You are in college. Go have some fun and meet people who are around you and you can actually talk to and get to know in person, not on a computer. My goodness.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 September 2013): You're not in a relationship, so either of you are free to see other people, and do as you please.
There is no cheating when he has not committed to you. You're just getting to know him, and he hasn't had any time to fall in-love with you. He's just planting that word in your head; because dumb girls fall for it.
You're not dumb.
So don't act like a little girl and take that seriously.
Saying he loves you, is just to keep you on hold believing he does. Don't play around with the word "love," it's something very serious. "Puppy-love" isn't real love. It's the kiddy-version. You're beyond that now.
If you are trying to make him a boyfriend, don't be the one pining away all weekend. All sad and weepy. Keep your weekends fun and busy. It's time to grow up, you're in college.
You're starting off badly in the dating world. You're putting all the power in his hands, and already showing signs of insecurity. That's immature.
He doesn't love you. He's not your boyfriend; just because you're talking and texting. He's just a guy you like, who has been chatting with you. He has to spend time with you and show you how much he likes you. Talk is cheap.
If he is MIA on weekends and you don't like that, then don't take him seriously until this changes. Weekends should be the time he is spending with you. Unless he doesn't have a job, and can't afford to. Let's hope he's working and saving up for that purpose.
Never let a guy think you're a weak and desperate female. That is not the message you want to send to any guy. Ignore that advice and see what happens.
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A
female
reader, Denise32 +, writes (17 September 2013):
You say you are TALKING to him. Are you two JUST talking or are you in a dating relationship?
Unless you are in a committed, exclusive relationship with him, there isn't any reason to expect to talk to him every day.........both of you are free to date others. And, perhaps talking (usually) every day is a little too much. Maybe he wants - and expects - a bit more space than you do.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 September 2013): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI'm just curious to know how I handle the situation about him not calling me for 3 days?
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A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (17 September 2013):
That's not a great reason to think he's cheating, but that combined with the fact that he usually thinks you're cheating when you go back home makes me suspicious. Usually people who cheat think their gf/bf are cheating too.
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