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female
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anonymous
writes: I've been seeing a guy for about 6-8months now, he is my best friend.... However I am now starting to have feelings for someone else. This is not the first time this has happened to me. - I don't want to hurt my partner, and I don't know why I am feeling like this, who sould I pick and how do I do it ?
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male
reader, eddie  +, writes (9 February 2006):
 I agree with Suorpio. There are always going to be people out there that get your attention. Are you going to go after all of them or settle down with the one you love and have a relationship? If you're young, maybe you shouldn't have a steady partner right now and you should be shopping around a little.Here's a queston for you. If you leave your boyfriend and go after the other guy, what will you do nest time you are attracted to somebody else? And the time after that.........etc.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 February 2006): Some people have trouble with loyalty because they feel like there is "one true love©" out there for them. By turn, they're always keeping one eye open just in case it turns out their current partner isn't actually "the one©".
The truth is, all of us could have relationships with any number of people if we devoted the effort to overcoming and tolerating their flaws. If you don't know this new guy that well, you may not be considering his downsides (which are unknown to you) compared against your current boyfriend's foibles (which are propbably painfully clear).
How to decide? Consider the risk. You probably know your current boyfriend pretty well at this point. Even if some things about him bug you, are they worth it for what he gives back in return? If not, you can consider pursuing someone else. But I wouldn't take a gamble on some new contender without incentive to leave the old relationship for its own sake.
Part of dating someone in the longterm will be dealing with new crushes - it's part of life. Older married couples even joke about this to each other, so don't worry too much about it.
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