A
male
age
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*r.B
writes:I dated this gal for about a month. at the time I really overlooked some odd things about her. No I'm not a glutton for punishment. Oddly enough I liked her but was cautious. She was a withdrawn person - not great social skills. Near the end of our first date she “projected” on me calling me quiet. She was inconsiderate for not thanking me for giving her gifts or flowers. She might say you picked these? (Instead of buying). She could do any of these things that I will mention at times. Selfish, affectionlesss, rude, silent, inflexible, and a bit arrogant. She never laughed as I remember and didn't smile a whole lot. She’d say at times odd things in front of me like " I could live the rest of my life alone". She back kicked me (karate) one night walking into her home for no reason. I played it off as a joke. What was so strange was that she said nothing after. She walked inside her home and just stood by her TV motionless for a few seconds.After a month together she asked me to call her if I was thinking of her. I didn't call her until four days later. Then she got mean. Tried to screen out my calls at her work. Later on the phone told me she was having a party, (that she did not invite me to). That was a lie, she only was trying to hurt me.We had one final date dinner with her work friend and her friend’s husband. After that I had to invited my self over to this gals house that night. That night she gave me the silent treatment, so I walked out.Many months later on I tried to reconcile. She was very hurtful and insulting to me in emails. She did not want to talk. (Nothing bad happened before here) She mentioned things like "I don't care about your silly stories about your finances and career" (My explanation) or "I hate men like you". (I did I break her heart in one month? Were both 42.) This is about one third of the story. I think she has some issues in her past and needs to a therapist? What do you think?
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male
reader, Mr.B +, writes (4 March 2007):
Mr.B is verified as being by the original poster of the questionAnonymous Gyul, If you think I'm running her down well that's you view. I can live with that type of behavior. Wierd is not wrong, just different. Just look back in history at some famous and special people. But I can not live with someone who is not nice. That's not compatable with most of the world here. You are right Anon-Gyul: "No she be no compatable wit me gyul. Jus leav me all vexed and make'n me feel like she be all bobolize". I have EVERY RIGHT TO discuss her behaviour and habits. Nor I don't have let it go just yet. I truly think ... without explaining the details here .... at the least SHE needs someone to talk to - in order to learn, and get another persons perspective on things. "So wat yu tink now Anon-gyul?"
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2007): You are obviously not compatable with this lady, there's no need to run her down or discuss her behaviour and habits as one person's 'wierdness' is another's normality. Just end it and leave her alone why don't you! xx
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A
male
reader, Mr.B +, writes (4 March 2007):
Mr.B is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI'll add one more thing here. We've all watched a movie and durring it you'll say something, right. Not talk too long - but a quick comment.
This is so wierd to me. Keep in mind this happened more than once with her and she likes watching movies. No other gal I've ever dated was ever like her.. Whoa!
When we would watch a movie on cable on the couch laying there together. She would be dead silent! She never commented on the movie, (during or after) ... she said nothing! never laughed .... or said anyhing ever.... just flat and emotionless like a sczitopath. She was not one ... she sought out social connections.
I can be pretty funny person (we all can be at times) and she never laughed, never!
Maybe this was all due to that fact that I didn't wear deoderant .... just kidding.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2007): Agree with Pon and Sunrise on this one. You've said enough about this gal's weirdness. If it were me in your shoes, I would've walked when she gave me the back karate kick and that would have been that. You are a patient man, dear. Just don't go back for more...because then I 'd have to say you could be bordering on being very stupid, hun,if you do. She sounds like a whacko. She has some big issues and you don't need the grief! Run like hell.
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A
male
reader, Ponungalungb +, writes (3 March 2007):
 You sound like a friend of mine. He dated a woman for about a year who would do all sorts of weird things. Why he stayed around is beyond me. I think he thought he could help her. He couldn't'.
I told him the same thing I'll tell you . . . run. Run like the wind. If she needs a therapist, let her decide that. How do you bring up that topic anyway? "Excuse me, dear, but I think you are friggin' crazy. Why don't you see a shrink?" LOL.
Run . . . .
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 March 2007): It is pretty hard to judge solely on your perception of her whether or not she needs therapy.
At the very least she does not sound like she likes you at all, and that she is definately not ready for a relationship....as she says she could happily live her life alone....women are often hurt by men when they let their guard down and let a guy know they are smitten, he flees never looking back....this may have happened to her more than twice and she is taking a different tack with you and going overboard the other way, strong, independent, hard to get and hard to know, and not holding up her end of the conversation.
I don't know why you would want to reconcile with the likes of her, though, she doesn't sound very nice at all, who knows if therapy is the answer, she may just have decided she did not like you and is being mean and hateful because she has been treated that way herself probably.
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A
female
reader, sunrise  +, writes (3 March 2007):
 Stay away, she is so mixed up, let a friend of hers know that you are concerned about her and ask them to get her some help. You dont need that kind of relationship, you need someone who appreciates you and she doesn't, she blames you for everything that goes wrong in the relationship and you've even started to believe that.
Move on, get out while you still have your sanity. She seems a bit psychopathic i wouldn't feel safe in her company who knows what she's capable of. Good luck to you and i sincerely hope she finds someone to help her deal with her isues.x
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