A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Last year I had an amazing chemistry teacher named "Sean" who is in his early forties. Not only was he amazing at teaching chemistry, but we had chemistry too. Sean is also the youth minister at my church. I'm only thirteen years old, but I know that it's a bit outta the norm the way Sean treats me, unlike any other students. Sean tells me I'm beautiful and compliments me constantly: my hair, my jewelry, my clothes...one time he even unzipped my sweatshirt to read the words on my t-shirt and even rested his hand on my knee when I was wearing a pair of jeans that are ripped in the legs. Sean also rests his hand on my shoulder and back when I'm seated near him and he grabs my arm to get my attention. Once when I had a bad day, Sean even took me in his arms and rocked me back and forth. When he was looking through my pictures on my phone after church a while back, he asked me if I'd send him some. He even bought me clothes for my birthday...nothing sexy, a sweatshirt, but come to find out his wife and daughters didn't know anything about the gift when I thanked him for it. My parents all think Sean's the nicest guy in the world and would say I'm overreacting if I told them how "friendly" Sean is sometimes. and unfortunately, I find myself infatuated over Sean as well, even though I know what he does is wrong. Please PLEASE help me. Thanks.
View related questions:
my teacher Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (20 March 2009):
Well it sounds like you have it under control and are being really sensible about it, that's great to know.
Don't dwell too much on what might have happened though. We can all have little day dreams of "what if" and they are fun but don't think anything in your mind would actually have happened.
As for telling him you care but no PDAs... unfortunately as a grown man, caring in a relationship is not enough. Men want physical contact and more if they know you like them.
It's just not worth even leading him on by saying you like him too as that is where he will want to go next.
Good Luck!! xx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 March 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionEmilyanswers...thank you so much for the advice & articles of reality. I'm trying my best to show him that I care about him immensely but don't really need the extra PDA's to know he cares about me. I had to get to a coffee house that was in a city 15 miles away for a poetry reading recently & missed my bus. He offered me a ride, but I called my parents instead. I still have to wonder what woulda happened had I gotten into the car with him...& also to annonymous reader, yes I do know any further activity after what's already occurring would be considered statutory rape.
...............................
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (20 March 2009):
I'm not going to say this is all in your head as sadly teachers do sometimes fall for their pupils, even if they are married and know it is wrong.
Here are some examples:
http://www.kansascity.com/news/breaking_news/story/1096373.html
http://www.mercurynews.com/breakingnews/ci_11942179
http://www.livenews.com.au/Articles/2009/03/20/Teacher_sacked_every_three_weeks_for_sex_crimes
As you can see from these, what seems to be a romantic relationship is called MOLESTATION when it comes to court and these teachers have been named and shamed WORLDWIDE for what they did.
My advice is that if you care about him then back away, don't give him the opportunity to hug you. Tell him you are not comfortable with it if he does.
Teachers make mistakes like this all the time, but it will cost him his job, his marriage, he may end up in jail and he'll end up having to leave town and get a job in a shop somewhere as he'll never be allowed near a school again.
If he's not being the adult here, then you have to be, and know this is a bad idea and don't let it happen.
The fact you've spoken to your parents about this already is a really good sign and I'm glad you are close enough to them to talk about this stuff.
Good Luck!! xx
...............................
A
male
reader, ArmyMedic +, writes (20 March 2009):
 Please search for "crush on my teacher" this question has been asked thousands of times on here and lots and lots of advise has been given, but don't expect to like all the answers you see!
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 March 2009): Please be very careful as sex with a minor is a punishable offence and this scenario sounds like it is going in that direction.
...............................
|
