A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:i was wondering if my relationship is about to end?me and my girl have been going out for two years now we are both 20.we have lived together about 1 year.the past 2 months have been really hard i keep doing romantic things for my girl such as a walk in the park,dinner,snuggle and watch a movies and i fill like just in the past few months ive been giving all the attention and not reciving any back i let her know this about a week ago and nothing has change.we havnt made love in a week and it makes me fill really insicure and it just fills like shes bored of me but i allways try to switch it up and go do fun things together.i cant figur out what is wrong.its the first time in my relationship that doesnt come natural,and that makes me wonder is it over in her mind (even though when i talked to her she said everythings ok).do you think its over?im so confused :(thanks Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 September 2007): No, I personally don't think it is over. But I will say you are only 20 years old! When I was 20, I didn't really want to always be snuggling and watching movies or walking in the park. At that age girls like to be a bit more active and a bit more involved in things that kids your age do that are a bit more exciting. Go to a bar. Get a fake id. Hang out with friends together more often. Go to a concert. Get a group together and go to the beach for a weekend. You guys do not always have to be alone just you two. Invite friends along a little more often. Interact with other people. Change up your routine. You can still occasionally go to the movies and dinner and have alone nights. But don't do it ALL the time. That does get boring. Especially at that age.
I am sure she loves you, though. But you guys are young and need to have a little more fun and do things a little more laid back that involves other people and that doesn't ONLY involve "romantic" stuff. That's all. I am sure she would be a lot happier if this happened.
A
female
reader, happytochat  +, writes (8 September 2007):
I can see how you are very confused. On one hand your gf is saying everything is OK, but on the other, her actions are suggesting something completely different!
Lets not jump to negative conclusions though, that will just have you being upset for possibly no reason at all! Perhaps something else is going on to make her act like this. Perhaps she has some other problem that she hasnt told you about? Perhaps shes feeling down and doesnt even know why.
Its understandable that her actions are making you feel very insecure about your relationship. Im sure everyone here on this site has been in a similar situation before, where our partner seems to be less interested and gives us little attention...
Sometimes the outcome is a bad one (that being the relationship is going down hill...almost at the end), sometimes the other person just has a problem going on in life, sometimes the other partner just may become slack!!! And not realise they are doing that.
I think you need to talk to her again. Give her EXACT examples of her behaviour, so that way she cant deny anything. And then after listing the examples, tell her how it makes you feel. Let her know it makes you worried and you want to know if shes ok, and if there is something not right in the relationship- so then you guys can work on it. Stay calm- thats really important. People are more likely to open up when they dfont feel they are being confronted.
Hopefuly if you bring the topic up again you will get some answers! If she continues to say evertthing is ok then just plain out ask her 'well why does it seem you have been showing me less attention lately?'
goodluck :) let us know how it goes!
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