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female
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anonymous
writes: What should I do If I found my friend lied ? Last week I asked my friend what did she do on holiday. She told me she went to another town to visit her grands. But the others said that she had a date with my boyfriend. What should I do ?
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2005): Careful not to draw any conclusions but if you do find out, that in fact they dated each other-don't accept any excuses and more lies. Your bf and best friend treated you with disrespect, they caused you pain and took you for a fool. Take what has happened and attain the wisdom and strength to move on from this deception. As hard as it is-you need to keep your strength, your confidence and self worth intact-to recover. Drop them both and let them have each other. Frankly, selfish people deserve each other. The trust has been shattered and you should never tolerate being treated like this. You teach other people how to treat you if you allowed this and if he "gets away with it", he will do it to you again and again.
Eventually when the hurt subsides and you have healed from all this..don't keep any anger at these people ongoing because you will trap yourself in pain and agony and that negative energy can crowd every other feeling out of your heart. If you wallow in resentment and refuse to forgive and move on, you will tear up your own life and never leave yourself open to new and wonderful relationships. You can't change the past-but you can deal with your feelings and hurt by learning to eventually free yourself to forgive them for what they both did to you. I'm not suggesting you be in their lives again, just learn to forgive others because it enables you to continue on living a healthy, solid life. Good luck to you and be strong and remember to keep loving & believing in yourself..
Hugs and Smiles,
Irish
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