| A
female
,
anonymous
writes: Dear cupids,This isn't a problem of mine but a friend's. I've been talking to her recently and lately I've noticed she's been feeling a little down. It turns out she really likes this girl in her year. I thought it was just a harmless crush but I've found out she's liked her for nearly 3 years now. She's almost finished school for good and she told me she wants to try and let the girl know of her real feelings for her, either in person or by letter but I'm worried and don't think this is such a good idea. She's told me before the girl she likes is straight and that there'll never be a chance for her, so in this respect I just don't see the point in her humiliating herself by confessing her feelings to her. My friends seems to greatly value my advice but I'm not sure what to tell her myself. I want to see her happy but I don't want her to get hurt at the same time. She keeps asking me if it's a good idea and I'm not sure what to tell her. Any help?
View related questions:
crush Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 December 2006): I would also like to add, if I was you, I would probably encourage her, while give her various different perspectives - possibly outcomes and how she may possibly react and feel afterwards, but end it by saying "Of course, I still encourage you to make your choice whether to tell her or not. Whatever you do however, and whatever the outcome, please know that I will always try to be there for you. Never hesitate in talking to me about anything."
A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 December 2006): Sometimes... [ponders] No actually, most of the time, it's 'better' to allow someone to feel hurt than to try to redirect him/her. People in nature, generally learn better through trial and error. Just keep in mind that as her friend, you can be there for her afterwards. Unless this scenerio brings her direct harm, I think you should stand back and observe her with consideration.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2006): you need to ask urself what would make ur freind the most happy? If u do tell her that u think its a really bad i dea and ur worried about her humiliation than will ur freind be better off by bottling it up inside? If u tellur freind its a good idea and let her go through with it is the humiliation going to destroy her? If u really know ur freind than u know how each will effect her and u should choose the lesser of tow evils. If its to let her not do it than u can be there for her and try and help her through it and find new love later on. If u let her go through it and it fails than u can be there for her and support her in her time of need. U shouldn't be afraid of peoples opinions becuase thats all they are just opinions and as long as ur freind is sure of her resolve than u should support her the best u can.
hope that i helped in soe small way! :) best of luck
...............................
|
