A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I think my boyfriend may be gay but I'm sure he would never tell me the truth if I asked. We have been together for almost 8 yrs. We were broke up for the good part of one year because he was arrested for threaten to kill me. He has since been through anger management and we are trying to work things out as we have a daughter together and I love him very much. He is a very poor communicator and has had issues with abusing me emotionally. I know he doesn't like himself and that is were it begins-not an excuse though-he has always had a fantasy about seeing me with another man-this always confused me as I felt if he loved me he couldn't bare the thought. Now it seems he likes to fantasize about also being with a man-over and above being with me-he always knew it bothered me when he thought about me with other men but has never changed. His sexual desires are proven to be more and more bi/gay orientated. Any suggestions would appreciated-I have been through so much-I just can't bare any more heartache :( Thank you!
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 June 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwell, we are still together. I split with him for the better part of a year once again and then life situations brought us back together. I find that I don't feel the same way I used to about him though. Thank you for your advise I do appreciate the response.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 June 2008): I guess he could be gay. But in any case, he sounds very troubled and he has no respect for you. Have you ever considered breaking up with him? You are very young and have spent a significant part of your life being treated like dirt by this guy. How much more time are you going to waste on being in this situation?
8 years is a long time and you may need therapy to help you break the habit of loving him. But I think that would be money well spent if it could help you get out of this relationship. It sounds miserable and you should know that any grass really is greener compared to this.
Do something for yourself and talk to somebody about this. A friend, a parent, anybody. Friends and family are often good at making you see how much better life has to offer.
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