A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:bare with me, im a little p'd off right now..ok, so im currently in a long distance relationship. its only for about 6 months or so until he comes back..im pretty sure he cheated on me, but only came half way clean, because i went off on him, so im sure it caused he to rethink about telling me the rest.. (i was wrong and stupid i guess)so ive tried talking to him about it, and every time i do, he changes the subject. i tried asking who the woman is, and he told me her name was pronounced "mrs. lighter" then, i looked at the list of employees he works with and that name wasnt on there. shes supposively a nurse. well, then he told me it wasnt spelled like that, it was spelled different, its "mrs. leiter." i looked threw the list again, and the closest thing pronounced that way was a "mrs. lihgiter" and shes a secretary (he works in mental health)ok, so now that weve worked everything out, hes been talking about his new found sexual fantasy (which we always talk about them with eachother) is for me to dress up like a secretary. he doesnt feel he should answer any questions about what almost happened, but who ever the girl is, they didnt get a chance to be alone, so nothing ever came about.. so he says.. and i dont want to keep hounding him about it because i dont want to be a nag, but i want answers. should i keep asking, and tell him i think she wasnt even a nurse, or would that be wrong on my part? i feel if hes not going to tell me who she is or what happened really, then i have a right to make assumptions.. right?? someone please give me some advice or input.. thanks aunts and uncles
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (17 October 2011):
 If he is serious about you well then he should just be honest with you. At least he told you half a story, it is something I guess instead of completely ignoring it. I can see why you would make the assumption that you did. It does seem a very big coincidence. You just need to be honest with him and tell him to be completely honest with you. Explain to him that because you only know half of the story you are thinking the worst and it is effecting you because you don't know what the truth is. Tell him that whatever it is he needs to be honest with you in order for your relationship to work.
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