A
female
age
30-35,
*ed
writes:I am totally in love with a boy I met at 14, we were together for a year and he taught me a lot of new things I had never experienced about love, we then broke up for another year as we made a descision, we obviously didn't realise it was going to be hard. But all of that year without each other we both missed each other, but after that we got back together and now we have been together for 7 months, it was the best relationship ever, I then found I was moving to Spain 3 months after getting back together, But we both travel twice a month to see each other not giving up. A month after living in Spain I found out I was pregnant, we made a descision to not have it, which was the hardest thing I had done in my life, it was so hard. Things have been going down hill lately, I feel like I've realised we're so different to each other now, I feel hurt while I'm with him and it's because of the way he has been dealing with everything. He hasn't been there while I went through the abortion on my own, he was out with his friends getting drunk leaving me at home on my own while all my family were in Spain, I came to England to go through it. I felt so lonely. He doesn't treat me like a lady, he thinks the only way of getting me back is to just make me feel sorry for him. He threatens me, that he is going to hurt himself. Each time he had hurt himself it's been because of me. I can't control him. He has tried comminting suicide in front of me so many times which hurts me so much.He's out every day, but what I don't understand is when he's out he's always hyper, happy, joky around, loves attention.I think it's love keeping us together now, there's more to love in a relationship, I can't go through the hurt I went through without him after that year again..xx What do I do???
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female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (23 February 2008):
 He is too young to understand what love is . He has been successful in preventing you from leaving by scaring and threatening you with suicide . He is in fact manipulating and controlling you with this threat.
You will have to pluck up your courage and leave him.You cannot negotiate with this guy . Plan your escape and be prepared till the day when you have the courage to make a dash for freedom from him.
Most of those threats are just threats only and he won't die for you. He is not that stupid anyway. He is just putting up a show for you only.
Mentally prepare yourself for leaving him.
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