A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My vibrator isn't getting me off... I think it's 'cause I'm too scared of going having an orgasm. I recently got out of a very long term relationship (almost 6 years), and we were each others first and only kiss, sex partners, etc. The sex was never good for me. He tried giving me oral 3 times and it was SO HORRIBLE that I just didn't let him go back down on me. I was never satisfied even once. I tried to masturbate, but I can't even get slightly aroused by that. I only felt cliteral stimulation twice, but only for a few seconds. So I finally gave up and bought my first vibrator (Butterfly Kisses). The first night I used it the little antennas were feeling really good, and I tried to relax, but suddenly it felt too strong and my arousal went from an 8 straight down to a 0. Wtf? I tried using it again the next day in the shower (in order to relax and it's waterproof), but I felt NOTHING. Just frustration. I don't know how to move it around or where to position it because I have never had the experience down there to know what I like. I know everybody says "explore your body", but self arousal does nothing, so I can't explore. Also, when I touch my clit w my fingers I just feel burning. So that doesn't do it. I really don't know what to do and how to use it. Could someone please please help? :(
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2009): Ha. Interested to hear what people have to tell you. I am similar... I get right about there and then freak out. Weird isn't it?
A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2009): As I understand, with females getting an O is contingent upon a mental release as well as the physical. You seem to have some mental hangups when it comes to sex and pleasure. You are exactly right, you are not LETTING yourself orgasm.
You have to surrender to the sensations.. Over analyzing them or fighting them will of course put you back down to ground zero. Just... let go. Hope that helps..I'm sure some ladies have better advice for you.
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