A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I'm 15, my boyfriend is 18; I'm sure you know what's coming.I think I'm pregnant. I know, I'm stupid and an ungrateful child who is going to break her parents' heart; I tell myself that everyday. So before you scold me and the like, please consider the fact that I know what I did was wrong and I might have to face the consequences soon.I'm a straight A student, and very active in school.how horribly will this affect my college hopes?Will I even have a chance at college and a career?Will my boyfriend be able to finish college and achieve his goals?I'm not looking for "well usually" or "most often."I'm looking for if there is still a possibility, a small gleam of hope.I am not about to let my boyfriend's dreams be forgotten because of a truly stupid mistake that was more my fault than his. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Welsh Uncle Dave  +, writes (29 November 2010):
you have had lots of advice here, but there is one thing that sticks out very strongly from your second sentence.
You THINK you're pregnant.
Go and get tested to find out for sure. You could be worrying about nothing. If it does turn out you're expecting, I would suggest following the advice that's been given.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 November 2010): You need to take a deep breath and realize that there are options available to you. If you are in the early stages of pregnancy you can opt for an abortion, you can opt to have the child and put it up for adoption, or you can have the child and opt to be a teen mom. These options are all life altering. Whatever your decision, it will impact your life forever. Please get adult advice. Family, mom, dad, aunt, your girlfriends' mom etc...someone that knows you and loves you. Parents are the best, but sometimes you just can't tell them - I understand. There are pros and cons of each option. Do what is right for you...what is right for you may not be what is right for others. Get guidance and accept that as an adult, (yes at 15 you are an adult now) we all make mistakes and we have to live with the results.
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (22 November 2010):
 Ok it was not more your fault than his, it takes two to tangle and he is the adult in this relationship therefore he should have known to use protection. So he failed you.
Ok first off you need to get to your doctor and have a test done to confirm that you are pregnant, at least then you will know for sure if you are or not. If you are then you need to be prepared for much bigger problems like your boyfriend getting you pregnant as this is concidered statuory rape when a girl is underage, and he could even go to prison for having sex with you, just remember that. He needs to be prepared for what is coming to him.
If you are pregnant, then you will need to talk to someone that you can trust, wether it be a family member or a friend. Your doctor will be able to refer you to someone that can explain your options and help you make the right desicion. Ok it will come as a shock to your family and they may be hurt but they will soon learn to accept it in the long run.
As for your future no it doesnt mean that it is over, yes children are very hard work and you need to be prepared for a very busy schedule being up at night and getting very little sleep it is very stressful. But young mothers can still cope, if you have supportive parents that want to see you have a future, then they might look after the baby through the day while you are at college, or you can always look in to nurseries. It is hard and not all people can achieve this or afford it but there is always hope.
Get to your doctor asap and find out first if you are pregnant. Goodluck and all the best in the future.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 November 2010): Don't worry there is plenty of hope for you! Although you will definitely have to make changes, the best thing you can do is stay optimistic. I have a few friends who had kids between 16-19 years old. They still went on to college. You need to talk to the guy who got you pregnant, and make sure he is there as he will be key in this. If you two support each other you can definitely still lead a normal life. Seek help from family and friends as well. It's a tough situation but set your mind to it and you can do it!
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female
reader, Dona Suncha +, writes (22 November 2010):
First of all - YOU and your Boyfriend are EQUALLY responsible - there is no logic in blaming and berating yourself this way -- and I know you know that becuase you have straight A's. Secondly, it is really easy to find out if you are actually pregnant. All drugstores have pregnancy tests and they are very accurate - some urine and the longest 2 minutes of your life and you will find out. Thirdly, if you are pregnant it is important to understand that pregnancy is the beginning of another life - not an incurable fatal disease. I was pregnant when I was 15, also a straight A student, and my son and I have survived. My mother was livid - (you need to hear the truth)but after a few days, she calmed down and let me out of the basement (kiddin' about the basement part) - but I was fortunate I had a great family that helped me (although I too was an ungrateful child - and yes they were pissed, but only because they knew how much harder I was going to have to work to achieve those things I wanted to achieve. College and a Career. So yes, at first your parent's may be upset with you and disappointed as I'm sure they may have had different hopes for you at this age and for your future. But whatever you decide to do, know that your parent's do love you and always will. None of us is perfect or mistake free - and Please stop putting your boyfriend and his hopes and dreams before you and yours. At the end of the day if you find out you are pregnant, talk to your parents as soon as possible. They want what's best for you and you will need pre-natal care. And if you find out that you are NOT pregnant - LEARN FROM THIS and get yourself on birth control or abstain, again talk to your parents - they too were Teens and while it may be a bit shocking at first - parents love unconditionally (it's a law). Good luck and God Bless - and don't forget to put YOU first ALWAYS! Or no one else will. -- Now go get your BFF to stand by your side and read the directions while you sweat it and find out for sure. Whatever the result, everything happens for a reason - stay strong. And remember children are not road blocks to success, for a Parent will never have a more powerful force driving them to success than their desire to provide a better tomorrow for their children. -- La Dona
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 November 2010): It will change your life forever. It will test your strength, integrity, and everything else. It is not easy at all. It is a long, hard road. However, you can do it, if you put your mind to it. I'm a single mother that made that choice and I'm 5 years through a Ph.D. It slowed me down but it didn't stop me. Having a child will teach you many things in life and if you have a loving heart and you're a good mom, you'll never regret it. Just make sure the dad stays in his life. It takes two to tango. He's just as responsible for this as you are and both of you deserve equal chances in life.
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