A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi thereI think I'm in love with my cousin, and I need some to talk to...in advance...I'm a long talker...so sorry...For a while, parts of my family did not see each other due to some animosity between stubborn heads of the families. Only recently I started to see my half uncles family again, and all was good. They we're like the family I couldn't have and I loved them more than anything. but for some reason, my half cousin and I started to become amazing friends and still to this day. We hang out all the time, telling each other everything about each other, asking questions we need answered. Shes smart, independent, strong, beautiful, really my ideal woman. We both share strong feeling towards each other and are really tight. I'd wouldn't let anything bad happen to her for as long as I live. We hug each other, cuddle, sit on each others laps, lay down together...and sometimes fall asleep on each other. All the time I'm being ridiculed on how guys would hate to be me...because of my cousin, and that I could never really be with her. And each time someone told me that, it was like my feelings became stronger for her. For about six years my feelings grew on that, and for six years my love for my cousin turned into a more intimate love. Another point to mention is that she is quite the popular lady among men, but for a while now she's been single, and has stayed single...which is weird for the girl who seemed to have more boyfriends than you could shake a stick at. I myself am also a very desired one too, and i seem to also be on this girlfriend strike as well. I love her with all my heart, and would never hurt her, let anything bad happen to her...or do anything to her that would hurt her....which is why I'm afraid of confessing to her. Also that coupled with the fact that society frowns on such a relation. I'm afraid of what she would think, afraid of what our family would think, afraid of not only losing her, but everyone else. I'm not looking for sex, I'm not looking for marriage or children....I just want to show my love. I feel ashamed I'm doing this online...but I feel like I can't tell anyone I know. Please offer me some advice.
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 January 2009): Hy there! I would like to tell you that there is nothing wrong in doing this thing online!It is exactly what i did!Let me tell you a few things that happened to me,it might help you.It all started last summer,when my 19 year-old cousin came to stay at my place for a couple of days.(she is from a differernt city)Everything went well,in fact everything was great.I did know about her but i didn't know she is such a great girl...And EXACTLY like you said,we hugged,we cuddled,and also we fell asleep together.Now you haven't mentioned this in your story,i guess i didn't happen for you two,but it happened to us:we kissed,a lot!Two nights consecutively...than she had to leave.Back than,i was convinced that she was in love with me,i know i was.But here is something VERY IMPORTANT for you:i didn't tell her what i feel,until we met again.This was about a month later when she came back to my city again.Then,somehow,i gathered ebough courage and told her:"i am in love with you..." and it was the stupidest thing i have ever done in my life... :(( since then,no more sleeping together,no more cuddling.We just meet sometimes,and then she hugs me,but only as a cousin.NOT as a lover or whatever.I hope she still likes me as a cousin,though...So my advice to you is:DO NOT TELL HER that you are in love with her.Let HER discover your feelings towards her,trust me,it will be better this way!I wish the best of luck to you!!!
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 December 2008): its natural to get that comfortable with your cousin, im sure in the begiinning there was no hang ups on impressing her and likewise, you two were at first family so you laid it all out. unlike relationships and dating where people are usually held back and nothing grows too often. i say take a step back and see if this is realistic. is it something that can recover if things that dont work out? have you ever been so honest with another girl before? have you discussed this with another family member? you said your love grew on all the negative feedback, is ithat what makes it more tempting? ask yourself these things and be honest.
if your hearts in it, tell her how you feel and let her know you are okay if she does not and ask her if shes comfortable remaining freinds, or if she feels the same, before you move forward, ask her where she sees it going. do you want to marry? have kids?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 December 2008): These are normal feelings when you get on with someone so well and everything just clicks. Just think that in some countries the royal family married their cousins to keep the the crown in the family and it is considered normal. But you should just keep your great relationship going without steping over the boundries. If things don't turn out the way you hoped then you may lose it all.
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