A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:when this guy first get near me i would get so nervous. and i guess i could say my heart would feel like it was beating fast. when we first went out he kissed me and i felt that "spark." But now its been two months. and i dont feel the same. he doesnt make me nervous and my heart doesnt beat any faster. and when we kiss it feels boring. i try but it doesnt seem to get any better. i could say i really like him but i dont love him. but i want to keep on trying but i dont really know what to do. because i dont really want this to end. not yet. but what can i do? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, LovelessAct1 +, writes (3 December 2010):
You can thank your brain chemistry for that one. During the first few months of a relationship, or getting to know someone you'd like to be in a relationship with, your brain goes on a frenzy of producing "feel good" chemicals which gives you the "spark," "butterflies," and so on. Now you are used to his presence and the chemicals simply aren't being produced as rapidly as before.Its normal for everyone and it'll definitely happen over and over again no matter which guy you're with. This is a common reason for cheating. When people stop getting that "spark" from their current lover, they often attach themselves to someone new and exciting, giving those great feelings all over again. However, it never lasts.I recommend talking to him and telling him you feel the relationship hasn't been as exciting lately. See if there are activities you can take up together to spend more with each other or coordinate a "date night" during the week, visiting a new fun location every week. Just make sure things don't become routine.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 December 2010): Well, yeah, seems like the spark has gone. Perhaps he was exciting at first and new but then once you got past that you realised there wasn't actually much holding you together.
Maybe it's best to call it a day
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