A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Hey... I am in a relationship that has been going on for 9 months and it has come to my attention that my bf is 'cheating' on me. I know it sounds strange but I am unsure of how I feel about this.Basically the situation is, my bf is lovely, he really cares for me and is there WHENEVER I need him for anything.. He buys me gifts and we spends loadsa happy time together.In the time we have been going out though, we haven't actually had sex yet, though we do please each other with oral / handjobs.I haven't caught my bf doing anything with another girl but in his messages he has written loads of sexual messages to a girl he knows... I don't know, and doubt if they have done anything together...I don't known whether to make a big deal out of this? I mean he might technically be cheating but then again he is completely satisfying me? He makes me happy and he says he loves me too. I know I shouldn't have gone through his messages. But I'm not sure of he will stop this once we have sex and he is fully satisfied?I love him, we are happy.. I'm a little bothered about it but I don't think any physical cheating is happening. What should I do???Sorry for the lOng post. But Plz reply.. Thanks x
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female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (11 November 2011):
I agree with the rest, sex with you isn't going to make him stop his emotional cheating.
He satisfies you but do you satisfy him?
Why haven't you had sex yet? Who's idea is it to wait?
Maybe he's not satisfied. Or maybe he just is looking to cheat on you. Even though it emotionally cheating, the intention to cheat is still there. Don't underestimate that.
The biggest issue is you don't trust him. What did he do for you not to trust him and look through his phone? You go looking for evidence, you often find some.
If you can't trust your boyfriend, then there's no need to be in this relationship. A relationship needs a solid foundation of trust (which this relationship is clearly lacking) in order to work. Otherwise, it's one rocky road of you checking his phone, FB, coat pockets, etc. and that can be very, very tiresome. No relationship has to be like that. If I were you I'd dump him. Why wait for him to physically cheat??
A
male
reader, eek +, writes (10 November 2011):
with my ex when i caught her cheating i thought she would stop she didnt and is now my ex. To love you need to trust. If you are in an exclusive relationship you should just be with each other. If not then your both free to play the field. You could ask him. But dont think he will suddenly be loyal if you have sex, If he is cheating he would probably just continue enjoying you both. One think to think of the next time you give him oral is where the part of him your about to put in your mouth may have been recently! x
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (10 November 2011):
if you go through his messages you don't trust him.
how can you say a man you don't trust makes you completely happy?
sex will not make him stop his emotional cheating...
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 November 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionCome on People please help me out :/
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