A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:A former co-worker of my boyfiend named Roy slept with my boyfriends ex-fiance shortly after they broke up two years ago. My boyfriend found out last year after he and his ex-fiance got back together briefly and she told him about it. He was pissed, and is still pissed even though he has moved on and is with me. Now Roy has a girlfriend and my boyfriend is oddly in touch with him often. The four of us are now "double dating" often. While it's fun to double date, my boyfriend constantly talks about Roy's girlfriend. His dreams often have her in it! I'm scared that he has intentions of having revenge sex with her. I find it odd how often we all hang out togehter, and my boyfriend will even flirt with her in front of all of us. He even goes as far to say that those two shouldn't be together and he can tell she isn't happy or ready to settle down with him.Is there anything I can do?
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broke up, co-worker, flirt, got back together, has a girlfriend, his ex, revenge Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Moo's Mum  +, writes (20 April 2010):
 The fact that he is still pissed about the ex fiance worries me. It means he hasn't really moved on. If I were in your shoes I'd talk to him about your worries and see what he says.
A
female
reader, raiders +, writes (20 April 2010):
 Talk to your boyfriend find out what are his intention with this chick. This beef he has with Roy has nothing to do with you, he should respect you. You two are in a relationship and he has to move on whatever happened between his ex and Roy is in the past. You are his future and by him trying to get revenge by sleeping with this dude girlfriend is not cool, because he is not only going to hurt Roy but he is going to hurt you too. Talk to him and let him know that if he were to be unfaithful with this chick, you would leave. Also let him know how disrespectful he is being towards you when he sit and flirts with her right in front of you, stand your ground.
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A
female
reader, kahlan  +, writes (19 April 2010):
 If i were you, i,d feel uncomfortable about this as well. Even if he isn't interested in his ex any more, he may be feeling as if Roy took the piss, and he wants revenge for what he sees as a slight against him. He may be happy if he can split them up, but if he is planning revenge by sleeping with her then he,s obviously not thinking about you at all.
I'd pull him up and ask what his problem is? When Roy slept with this lassie, your boyfriend and his ex weren't even together so it isn't as if anyone was cheating.
Ask him why he's still bothered by it. He cant help how he feels, but he can help how he deals with it.
Tell him his behavour is making you feel uncomfortable, and that you don,t want to go on anymore foursomes with them. Roy obviously isn,t keen on this guy so if he insists on the foursomes i would say he's up to something-as i said either to split them up, or to try for a revenge shag. If thats the case,although easier said than done perhaps,i'd seriously consider ending the relationship as you deserve better and find a guy who will think of you first. Good luck!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 April 2010): You are right in thinking he is trying to have revenge sex. I think you should confront him about the whole situation. If he wants to remain in a relationship with you, then he needs to let the past go. Don't tolerate his behavior because its very disrespectful.
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