A
female
age
30-35,
*onfussed?????
writes:Im 17, nearly 18. I have a tendency to go for older men, Normally about 24,25. But in this case i like someone who is much older! He's 59. Im not normally attracted to men this age but he is a huge expection! I see him everyday, at a sports club where i also go. He's always quite keen to talk, and from what other poeple have said, i think he is quite attracted, but that is just an assumption. when he was younger he was quite Promiscuous and from stories and gossip still is!...I dont know whether the attraction is purely curriousity, or there is actually something there... or whether to act on it or not??? Please, im really confused about this! any advice or opinions would be great!!Thankyou!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 May 2008): I have the same issue. Usually I date guys who are 23-25, I'm going to be 18 in a month, but I've known this man for over a year now, as we play the same sports at the same location. He's old enought to have a 19 year old son (never married), and we clearly have sexual chemistry for each other, and love being around each other! It sucks because my best friend doesn't want to hear ANYTHING about it, and she thinks it's totally discusting. I know it's fun and temporary-- so if knowing that makes me safe---is that okay to continue having fun for the time being?
Would love advice.
A
male
reader, WastedLife  +, writes (10 May 2008):
I have to differ with the majority here - I have had relationships with women with almost this age gap and it has been heaven for me, and very special for the women I was lucky enough to be with. There's enough discrimination in the world already. Nothing is "just sex", at least not for me. Sex is VERY important in my life, and it's not that easy to get, and any woman that is compatible and willing gets my full attention, devotion and love. I can not only keep up(and keep it up), but I can lead, follow, or dance together in the joyful flow of life. Of course, other men my age may act differently, have different interests, and some may take advantage of women, but that is true at any age. If you are interested in him, go for it the same way you might with any other guy. Let him know that there is an age gap that others judge by even though that seems wrong, and deal with it openly and honestly. Be sure he is not married or committed to someone else, and agree on the ground rules of your relationship. Good luck and have fun.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 May 2008): He wants you for sex. that's all. he is old enough to be your father. doesnt that bother you? its curiosity you are feeling now. instead of finding out the hard way, after him using you for sex, and you getting hurt, know that he has no intentions for a relationship. leave, get gone before he uses u.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 May 2008): well im 17 and married just married to a 35 year old man
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 May 2008): You already asked this question today. What do you want people to tell you ? The consensus is that it's not a good idea, and he is probably married anyways. If he is promiscuous to the point of you hearing stories about it, what do you think he'd want with a 17 year old? Sex, that's what, & that's all. If you don't mind being used for that then by all means, but I think you have some major self-esteem issues going after a 60 year old man.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 May 2008): I would seriously think about finding someone your own age...Guys at this age will be wanting different things in a relationship to what you will be looking for. Your relationship will be so much more successful if your with someone your own age who has similar interests to you.
Good luck x
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