A
female
age
41-50,
*enk36
writes:Hello all,11 years ago when i was 16-17 i had a relationship with a bloke of 18-19. We were good friends before (i classed him as a best mate) but we had AMAZING and very adventurouse sex. i was going to uni so was unable to continue to see him. So he found someone else (heartbroken) and I didn't see or hear from him for 11 years as didn't see the point and got over him.Trouble is now we are back in touch, and both available. We just make each other so aroused it is untrue- its almost painful, why the hell do we feel as though we just left off?? We havent even met up yet and i'm completely infatuated. What do you think the pitfalls could be? I tend to get attached very easily- should I hold back or throw myself back in there? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, ChiRaven  +, writes (7 July 2008):
 The pitfalls now are no worse than with anybody else, and probably better than with most since you have some history together. You'll probably get attached, because that's what you do. If he leaves, you'll get hurt, because that's what you do.
Weigh the pros and cons of getting into a relationship at all at this point. Is it something you want? If you decide it is, adding in the "ex-factor" shouldn't be all that big a deal.
Although it seems like no time has passed, do remember that you're not the same people you were a decade ago. You'll have to relate to one another as people of almost 30, not as teenagers. Sex can be just as good (BETTER!), but the emotional and social dimensions of the relationship should be appropriate to adults, not to teens. If you try to be "just the way you were" the relationship will come apart very quickly.
A
male
reader, StudentOfLife  +, writes (7 July 2008):
 I say go back to see what man he grown into. But that just me, I'm the curious type.
I feel as if you may regret not going back to see him. Maybe there's something still there, maybe not. Only one way to find out.
I prefer crying because I got attached than regretting something I should have done.
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