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age
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anonymous
writes: We've been separated for 3 years! He is telling his so called girlfriend he hasn't sought a divorce because of our kids. Our kids are adults!! I don't think he doesn't want to divorce me, I caught him cheating, I was devastated he begged me to forgive him but I just never got over it.Then I caught him again on dating sites, so we separated. I still love him, but he's heartless and mean to me, and of many girlfriends says he hasn't divorced me because of my kids ?????? what do you think Aunties, and btw..I still love the man, so be nice...but be honest and thank you
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 December 2013): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionOh I didnt clarify that this woman he's with has been with him for over alittle over a year, And I am completely separated from him, we have divided our things he left me with with everything. The thing is I filed for separation papers he still till this day has not signed them. As for divorce, I am thinking of doing it myself, I had made a promise to myself I would never file because of my promise to God, but I see I will have to break that. I want him to marry this woman hes with!! She's evil she's been stalking me and even changing herself to look like me. Btw..thank you for giving me some advice your all so sweet and honest.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (4 December 2013):
he does not want one for many reasons.. the biggest probably being he can say to women "i can't get serious I can't get a divorce" but then there are many who will still give him sex.
or perhaps he's aware that you will be able to charge him with cheating and that will garner a bigger settlement in court...
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 December 2013): As long as he remains legally undivorced hubby does not have to divide assets and property with you or pay you alimony based on his income while preventing his new girlfriend from getting her claws into his finances, so maintaining the status quo is a win-win for him.
I suggest you retain an attorney to file for divorce and take him to the cleaners, that way he'll know for sure if his new girlfriend really loves him enough to marry him when she has nothing to gain financially after you get through with him.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (4 December 2013):
 Probably it's not that he does not want to divorce you, it's more than he does not want to marry his current Gf or the next ones. If he is still legally married , his excuse for eskewing , at his age, some solid comittment is his marital status. If he were single... what excuse would he have ?
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (4 December 2013):
 Why not file the divorce papers yourself?
He isn't doing the divorce because it's his ACE in his dating games. He can date anyone and not have to commit to anything MORE then dating. Because he "can't". He isn't divorced...
Why stay married (technically) to this man? You say you love him, but love can't erase the past or change the fact that he was a crappy husband to you.
I would file for a divorce. That way you are LEGALLY free of him. He will ALWAYS be the father of your children but YOU will be FREE. Which I think, you deserve.
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A
female
reader, banditsmom1124 +, writes (4 December 2013):
 there could be a few reasons for this...he might be too cheap to pay for one, he uses his status as a way to keep women from getting too attached, or the status gives him the elusion of cheating. who knows why he hasnt filed but he wont change his ways so dont take him back...ever. hes already proven hes a cheater.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 December 2013): Old habits die hard. He doesn't want to get married again and doesn't see the point in divorce. Its hassle and costs money and being separated is an excuse not to commit to girlfriends.
YOU are what's important here and now. You had no choice. He didn't respect the relationship he had with you and doesn't respect the ones now.
He wants his cake and to eat it.
You did the right thing....well done. Live your life now and be happy. He is not relationship material....for anyone.
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