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age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: I feel I am obsessed with a guy I slept with on a first date. I have never felt such incredible connection before, it wasn't just physical, it was emotional and spiritual too, really cannot explain it - it was crazy! I keep looking him up online and see his dating profile and social network site and I feel jealousy. I have got a problem and I need help, he has not been in contact since, obviously getting what he wanted and disappearing. What is wrong with me? Why can't I stop thinking of him, never in my life have I been infatuated with anyone like this and I try not to think of him and just feel like it is my fault etc..
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male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (10 October 2011):
 I'm sorry to read that you fell in to one of the oldest traps in all of history....
Guys pretend to like girls in order to get them to put out..... Girls, as a result of putting out, believe that they have begun a relationship.....
Problem is, you can't have a relationship by yourself....
Good luck.... There's a much nicer guy out there for you...
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (9 October 2011):
 the only thing wrong with you is that you trust and put your heart out there early on...
sadly it seems the old saying "women need to have a reason to have sex men just need a place" is true here...
each day will get a bit easier... and maybe next time hold your heart close to you and keep your body to yourself a bit longer till you are a bit sure of his feelings...
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A
male
reader, respectable guy  +, writes (9 October 2011):
Hey there. I am sorry you are heart smashed. i wish to give you something from a guy's perspective. After a male finishes there is honestly a mental and sometimes even physical change occurs almost immediately after cumming. That is why we fall asleep or change drastically. When the guy gets that, let's call it final feeling, there ends the animal type conquest which both ladies and dudes like to play. This is the meeting game and perusing each other is so exciting and wonderful. When a guy has to pursue you it makes him think outside the box. He goes crazy trying for this new girls affection. Is continues day after day and grows. It is like plucking a rose bud instead of waiting for the while beautiful bloom. Yes there certainly is a magic about meeting someone and just not talking,then making crazy animal sex. The trouble is, like the animal kingdumb, the male has accomplished something and moves on. There is a reason why relationships last up to eighty years. People need time to wrap each precious day-together. I hope i don't offend or sound preachy . I was one of them.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (9 October 2011):
 You never done anything wrong, he is probably very good at playing people and putting on the charm when he wants something, he has not contacted since so to me this says in his eyes it was a one night stand, but he is probably very good at making a woman feel connected to him and puts on the charm. It is horrible when something like this happens, there is very good players out there. But you need to remember it was only one night so it won't be that hard to get over. You are probably feeling lonely and want someone in your life and this is probably why you feel yourself attached to him because in your eyes he seemed the perfect match. You need to accept now though that all he wanted was sex and nothing else. You need to put it to the back of your mind and move on. Delete is contact details of your computer so that you don't keep checking up on him and get on with your life.
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A
female
reader, janniepeg +, writes (9 October 2011):
 I once was infatuated like that but once I focused my attention on someone else that infatuation was gone like the wind. He probably had some chemical clicks with you, matched your criterion of a good father gene, and that's it. It is definitely not your fault because it takes two. If sleeping on a first date feels right for you don't change anything. Remember never change anything about yourself to get a man. No buts or no waiting just in case. If men don't agree with what you do then NEXT!
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