A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Dear readers,I am such a lost lamb and I don't know whether I have a question or I just need badly to tell my story as I there is none who could hear me out. I would appreciate any advice given as I am absolutely lost.It all started 4 years ago and we dated for several months I was very inexperienced and I showed my eternal love. Well it all ended and I was left with a broken heart. Soon I found a very nice, intelligent, caring guy and we have been dating for 4 years since then. For all those 4 years I had been seeing my ex every day as we were studying together. But now as my last summer of studies ended the fear of loosing him forever struck. I sincerely love the guy I am dating now but it is more a platonic love and the other one is a true love I guess? Well it looks well till now however on the last day of summer I have not exactly confessed my love but just gave a hint about my warm feelings I can't say that I got a negative response but we were hitting around the bush. The problem is that I am leaving the country for almost half a year with my boyfriend. My ex said that we will meet before I leave but than I have several questions. First: should I meet him? Because I feel like I won't be able to give love to my current man if I won't end it with the ex.Second: if I meet him what should I do? Is the "tomorrow the world will end" kinda date is ok? or should I stay 100% faithful?Tell me am I just deceiving myself and being stupid? Maybe I should play an ice queen and that would be for the best? Please don't answer with cold hearts.Yours trulyJuliet
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 September 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you I understood what you have told me and I will certainly forget him and date my man seriously as I did all those 4 years before.
A
female
reader, Trinklett  +, writes (4 September 2011):
 You're ex is messing with your head. If he wanted you he won't have waited for 4 years while you're with your current bf because you're going away he wants a 'take' home gift. He broke your heart before and he's about to do it again. You've been with your bf 4 years if that doesn't mean anything to you then I feel for him. You should let him go so that he can be with someone who cares about him.
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A
male
reader, N91 +, writes (1 September 2011):
 Have you talked to your ex about a future recently? You said the last time you spoke it wasn't particularly negative, so how do you know something isn't there for him aswell?
First things first though, I'd split up with your bf, sounds to me that you're just with him for security but you'd leave him immediately if your ex wanted to get back together and IMO that's not fair at all and I think that you're using him a bit.
Think things over and then come back
Hope this is helpful.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 September 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThe problem here is that I know that if I stay with my current BF I will be ok and I have no future at all with my EX I am sure that we can't be together but the bad thing is that I want to be if there was a possibility I would gladly take it but there is none and this feeling tors me apart. I don't know that is insane seriously how love messes everyone up...
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A
male
reader, N91 +, writes (1 September 2011):
If you love your current bf in a platonic way then why are you dating? That's not fair on him as he thinks you're together based on love, whereas by the sound of things, for you its a friendship as you're still hung up on your ex.Sounds like you're still in love with you're ex and deep down you know you want to be with him - only you truly know what you want to do, but be fair to your bf, if you only love him as a friend then tell him so that he can move on and find someone that truly loves him, so he can be happy, don't string him along if your hearts not in it.Do what YOU feel is right, if you still love your ex and see a better future with him then tell him, at least he will know how you feel and you will have gotten it off your chest and probably feel better for it too.Hope this helps.
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