A
male
 ,
anonymous
writes:OK first of all I'm really inexperienced when it comes to dating and gf's etc,I have been seeing my first gf for only a month now. Yet I see her sometimes talking to other guys who aren't close friends, which makes me a little jealous, even though she talks to me a lot.I don't understand this, I talk to girls all the time who aren't even friends with my gf and it doesn't really bother her. Yet when the opposite happens, I just wanna break the guys neck.Can anyone help as I know I really shouldn't be jealous but I can'thelp it.
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reader, XenoSilk +, writes (6 September 2006):
i have the same problem sometimes, but slowly am learning to deal with it, you just have to think to yourself exactly what Dr Pete said, if she wanted to be with someone else, she would be but seeing as she's still with you there is no reason to worry, just be strong and tell yourself in your head to chill and you'll be fine
A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 August 2006): Mate, you've identified why this is happening already.
You are inexperienced when it comes to dating and girlfriends.
I'll get straight to the point: If you show this insecurity for too long your girlfriend WILL end up resenting you and breaking up with you.
So how do you stop it? Well, the problem is all down to your insecurities. You do not trust her, and you do not trust the guys she talks to. First, you need to accept that if your girlfriend wanted to be with someone else, she would be. It's as simple as that. But she doesn't - she wants to be with you.
So what even if a guy does try it on with her. I'm sure she will turn them down and say "I have a great boyfriend, thanks". Or are you scared that a guy better than you will come along? That again says a lot about you, nothing about her. You need to have more belief in yourself that you are good for your girlfriend. You must be doing something right because otherwise she wouldn't be your girlfriend!
Girls are a bit like flowers. They need lots of love and attention but they also need space to grow and be free. If you try and stop this beauty from being free their love and affection for you will quickly wither away and you will never get that romantic feeling back. It is very important for girls to feel like their man trusts them and allows them to do the things that they should be allowed to do.
The truth is mate, girls are usually hit on by men wherever they go in public. Some guys are suck wankers they'll even try it on with your girlfriend when you're stood right next to them. Trust in your girlfriend and belief in yourself will see you through these situations and not let it affect your relationship.
If your girlfriend feels you are confident and trust her, she'll always ignore other men. If you stay insecure and moody, she'll quite likely be more tempted to talk to another man who is the things you used to be; funny, happy confident.
Good luck mate.
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