A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I am 40 years old, mom of one. My boyfriend and his daughter have been living with us for the past 3.5 years. To be honest, this is the first time I've felt that "in love" feeling...deep, caring love. BF had to go stay with his best friend for Halloween weekend. His best friend was working so he was home alone with his best friend's live-in girlfriend. He came home from the weekend and told me: 1. He was curious about something so he did everything in his power to get aroused by this woman. He wanted me to know that he discovered our "bond" was much stronger than he thought because he couldn't do anything with her. This was supposed to make me feel good. 2. Had he not met me, he would have probably ended up with this woman (his best friend's more-or-less spouse)3. His best friend has been angry with him because apparently her pregnancy last year "might have been his." 4. He could "do her" if he wanted to, but they refrain. They just sit and hold hands. I sat there open-mouthed, completely unable to speak. My first thought was "you needed confirmation of our bond? You've lived with me for 3.5 years!" My next thought was "why on earth would he think it was YOUR baby" and lastly, "I am completely not okay with you holding hands." Hmmm...not the most rational of responses, I admit. But he swears that he wants to be with me, that he loves me and that he told me all of that to make me realize how much he felt for me. Uh, okay? So since that night I've been snooping. I don't like it, but I admit it. I checked our cell phone usage online and he and she text and talk pretty much all day off and on, but NEVER when he is at home, only during work hours. I think my brain already has this pretty much summed up, but my heart wants desperately to believe him. I know what the "texting on the wall" says, so to speak, but is it possible that he really does want to be here, with me and my daughter, or am I simply acting the pathetic, unwanted woman and fighting for something that doesn't exist?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 November 2010): I know you must be heartbroken, but you need to break things off with him and get him out of your house! It will take time to get over him... but it's better than going through years of heartache. You deserve so much better. Please keep us updated.
A
female
reader, largentsgirl89 +, writes (14 November 2010):
 Red flag. I would lose him. He sounds like an ass and as if he has been using you. Why did he have to go stay with his best friend if his friend was at work. He pretty much confirmed that he cheated on you and the fact that he was trying to get aroused and didn't doesn't mean anything, they could have had sex and he is saying they didn't. do you believe that? He was holding his best friend's girlfriend's hand?
"might have been his", he had sex with her last year and might have gotten her pregnant. He would be gone. You don't deserve that and you should have to put up with it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 November 2010): I am very sorry for your heartbreak. Deep in your heart you know what you have to do. End it with him immediately and inform his 'friend' of what has been disclosed to you. Close the door, change the locks, and have nothing more to do with this man. He is a liar and a cheat incapable of respecting his 'best friend'... and utterly incapable of anything approaching dignified with regard to you.
I will never understand why people need to be so cruel and create so much collateral damage as they walk through life. It is so sad.
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (12 November 2010):
 What was reasoning for going to stay with his best friend on Halloween weekend?
1. He was testing the bond of your relationship..or is that his justification for cheating? Something to ponder.
2. If you two were to break up, he would be with her in a split second.
3. So he did sleep with her! How else could he be in the running of fatherhood?
4. He refrained from doing her, but nothing stopped him at hand holding. How does explain 1 and 3?? Did he whack off in a cup and donate his sperm to her?
The writing is very clear on the wall..you have a grade A jerk. Why continue to be with someone who has clearly verified he has cheated on you and would be with his best friend in a split second? What are you fighting for, if he loved you none of this would have happened? You think with your brain not your heart.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 November 2010): This guy doesn't sound like he can be trusted and too be honest i'm pretty shocked about those things he said to your face about this woman. He completely disrespected you.
I think you should take a long hard look at the relationship because now this has happened you're going to be paranoid everytime he's not in your sight.
I have a feeling he came on to this woman and she turned him down.
1. He was curious about something so he did everything in his power to get aroused by this woman. He wanted me to know that he discovered our "bond" was much stronger than he thought because he couldn't do anything with her. This was supposed to make me feel good.
This just doesn't make sense, why would he get aroused by her but not want to go all the way? I bet she turned him down.
2. Had he not met me, he would have probably ended up with this woman (his best friend's more-or-less spouse)
So, basically he settled for you because he can't have her. What a nice guy(!)
3. His best friend has been angry with him because apparently her pregnancy last year "might have been his."
So he's actually had sex with his best friends girlfriend and might have gotten her pregnant?
Wow this guy's a catch.
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