A
female
age
51-59,
*sarmynurse42
writes:My Fiance and I have decided to have a ffm Threesome, we decided to use an Escort for it. My fiance had Threesomes before with his Ex GF, it is my first one. Also I'm not BI not into other females at all. But know he likes to see the Bi of the women, so I agreed that it would be ok for the other girl to kiss me touch me and perform oral on me but I won't do anything to her.I'm having 2nd thoughts now, having a real Problem with seeing my SO with another female pleasing her orally and penetrating her. The Agreement was that he would get her aroused but wouldn't go all the way to make her climax, then it was he is not going out of his way to make her cum but if it happens it happens.I know she is an Escort and is getting payed to have sex with us, that she is just a toy, and their for our pleasure, and probably not getting anything out of it.Was anybody else ever in the same Situation and how did ya'll handle it.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 April 2013): I'm in your boat, I've been with women and LOVE it, but... I've been married 2 yrs this month(together 7) and we have an escort waiting for us tomorrow night. I am not sure if its my insecurities or intuition but, I have a bad feeling about the whole situation. Hubs is insecure and I can see him using this against me(eventually) even though it was his idea, I'm not nervous about the act, I'm nervous about the aftermath. I know I'm going to love it(will he notice how much I love it) AND (This is where my insecurities play)...Will he be more attracted to her than me?I've had three-somes before and it's always ended up the boy in the corner wishing he could partake. My jealousy and greed are fighting big time.
A
female
reader, KristenUSA  +, writes (10 April 2013):
 If you are having second thoughts, please tell your fiance.
Maybe you can find something that you would be more comfortible with. Perhaps just kissing and touching would be ok.
But either way, discuss how you feel with your fiance. A good relationship means you can talk honestly about anything with your partner, and work out a fair solution that both of you can be comfortible with.
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A
female
reader, Euphoric29 +, writes (5 April 2013):
Dear OP,
I agree with the others that you shouldn't do it if you have second thoughts.
And on top of that, I would like to criticize that you both seem to think it's okay to hire a prostitute.
Do you really think this experiment is going to be genuinely pleasurable if one of the participants is only doing it for the money?
If this man can see a woman as a toy and pay her for sex, do you think he really has a healthy opinion on women and sex in general? If your fiance can do things to a woman without worrying she'll really enjoy it, could he finally do things to you without worrying about your pleasure, as well?
When I'm with someone, I draw a lot of conclusions by watching their behaviour towards others.. that's all I'm saying.
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A
male
reader, eddie85 +, writes (5 April 2013):
 I agree with most of the other answerers here. You do have the right to terminate this arrangement -- even if you've changed your mind.
There are so many things that can go wrong:
1) An STD. Condoms can protect you from some things, but not all. There is the chance of HPV (which can be transmitted orally), warts, herpes, and more. What happens if the rubber breaks? Do you really want to start your marriage at the doctor's office?
2) Your fiancee is going to want to go all the way with this other woman. You are basically giving him a free pass to cheat and believe me -- he is going to take advantage of it. It is pretty easy to talk about "rules" now but when you have a hot, young escort ready, willing and able... things happen (I've seen it reported too many times on this site).
3) I would take a long hard look at the sexual "chastity" of your boyfriend. His history and his need to have a 3-some indicates to me he may have some more oats to sow. Is he ready for monogamy? Are you?
4) By giving him the green light for this event, you could be setting him up to have discrete encounters with others and he'll be able to rationalize the reasons why he does it. After all if you've allowed him to cheat now, what harm would it cause if you don't know about it.
5) What exactly do you get out of this arrangement? Are you too afraid to say "no" to your boyfriend or are you willing to risk your sexual fidelity for a one-night stand?
Only a select few couples can handle the 3-some deal. If you are here posting your doubts, you are very likely not one of them. Hopefully you take some time and look at what I've enumerated above and really think this through. Your decision on this event could color the rest of your lives together...
Eddie
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 April 2013): Honestly, if you don't want to do it, don't do it. You won't be able to live with it, trust me. It WILL eat up at you.
Women in general are very jealous, and unless you're ready to see your FIANCE with another woman, then go for it. But who's to say he won't want to do it again once you are married? Will you say yes to that too? You're giving him too much power in making your sexual decisions.
Conclusion: Don't do it. Escort or not, it's YOUR future life with him, not hers. If he mopes and gets angry, then you should rethink your future marriage.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (4 April 2013):
 As a guy who has struggled to get girls to have a "two-some" with me... I can tell you that I have no idea how I would handle it if TWO girls were naked with me at the same time....
Considering my advanced years.... I believe that it's quite possible that I would experience cardial (heart) difficulties if it ever came to pass that two girls were naked and with me in the same room at the same time...
Nonetheless... it DOES make for a great fantasy!!!!
Good luck....
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2013): If he's your fiance', you're starting out on the wrong foot.What kind of marriage are you expecting? You are trying too hard to please him. Even at your own expense. What's wrong with you? You are heading for a very strange marriage, and you aren't really up to all the things that he requires of you sexually.Are you ready for a poly-amorous or open relationship? He is introducing other women into your engagement; so that door remains open throughout your marriage.You are going to be writing Dear Cupid again, once you go through with this tryst, and again once you're married to this man.Why do people agree to things they know they don't want to do, knowing it could leave scars? You won't be happy after this and you know it. You are pretending to be more progressive that you are. If you go through with it, you should do everything that it requires. You must kiss the other woman, go down on her, and everything else he wants to see you do. He'll keep at it until he gets what he wants, or he may even intoxicate or drug you to force you to.Are you marrying him for love or money? Money is the usual incentive behind giving up your core beliefs, risking injury, emotional stress, and giving in to every demand placed on you. Some people will do anything for financial security.What's love got to do with this? If you'll do it now, you'll have to do it again and again.If you think this is a once-time proposal, you are dead wrong. He is introducing you to a life-style.You said you'd do it. Now do it. Once you've opened that door, have the stones to walk through it.I'm not judging you for having a threesome. I have a problem that you're not doing it because you want to. If you can handle it and willing to make it a part of your life. Go for it.
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A
female
reader, bee1382 +, writes (4 April 2013):
Don't do it if you love him and y'all are both serious about each other it will ruin your relationship especially if your not into at all that's sometimes hard to deal with even when you are into it but when you realize after its to late you can't take it back. If he knows your not comfortable with the situation and still insist then he don't have any respect for you at all.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (4 April 2013):
 if you don't feel good about you you go to him and say "i'm sorry I've thought more about it and I just can't do what goes against my feelings to please you."
to be honest if he can't deal with you saying no and sulks about it, then perhaps he's not the man for you.
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