A
male
age
36-40,
*attwilko
writes:Hey I have a bit of a problem. I really want to improve my sex life, with my girlfriend! We used to have really passionate sex, and I loved it. Now though, it seems like we're just doing the same things, and it's hard to introduce new things. I really don't want the passion to die because I love sex too much!!Here's the problem:The usual routine follows: I lick her boobs, I go down on her, she sucks me off, then she gets on top of me and begins to ride me until she cums. Many times she has expressed a desire not for me to go down on her. She doesn't really enjoy performing oral sex on me either.She doesn't like it when I'm on top because she says it hurts too much. I have a pretty big cock, I think I measured it 7.5 inches long, 5.5 inches circumference. But that's no excuse not to try any other position, and its not TOO huge to make it a problem, maybe if it was some 9 inch monster or something. I can't properly penetrate her when I'm on top because she wants me to go so slow! But I've been with other girls before and they REALLY enjoyed it (they still ask me for more even though I stopped seeing them). I don't understand... I just feel hurt almost everytime we have sex because I want to enjoy it too, but I can't without being able to express myself fully and taking a more manly role. I don't cum anymore during sex because of this and it's frustrating. I've cheated on her before with another girl. To be honest, the sex with her was MIND BLOWING. But my girl friend loves me, and I really love her and we got over the whole cheating thing. We're 9 months into the relationship now and she's getting back from a 2 month internship in India and I want to have some great sex with her...
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 August 2008): i suggest watching porn and trying to re-enact it. sure sometimes porn is also repetative but it's not always the same positions. you've got to be able to talk to her about these kinds of things.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 August 2008): Hi Mattwilko,
It dose sound as if your sex life is boring. Press that, push that, climb on top, done. You sound like you've written a list of what needs to be done to have sex. Get yourself an advice book on sex, something like the "Joy of Sex" by Alex comfort will give you more ideas. Sex shouldn't be like this. There are so many things that you could do. However cupidguy is right to point out, that in 9months you've already cheated, that dosen't sound good. Thinking about wild wonderfull sex with other women, makes me think that you will cheat again. You say you've got over the whole cheating thing, well maybe you have, but for your girlfriend, it dosen't really go away, she will never forget how you broke her trust. Maybe you should put a hold on sex at the moment, and arrange some romantic activities and actions, that will show her you love her and you think that she's great.
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A
male
reader, DoubleM  +, writes (7 August 2008):
 Well in my opinion, sex is something that always is going to be somewhat repetitive. If you are currently about 20-something and getting bored, how will you feel 30 years from now? That's why at least some people cheat, I suppose. But if a relationship is truly loving, you just keep working to please each other and accept that the excitement in the beginning will fade to a degree.
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