A
female
age
30-35,
*razygirl20
writes:I really want plastic surgery because I hate the way I look, I dont like looking in the mirror because everytime I do, I feel like Im going to cry. What can I do to feel happier about myself? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (1 December 2010):
 Just a quick ,practical advice about hair.
Don't trim it . It's a myth that hair need to be trimmed every 6 weeks or so, I used to have waist length hair , and I never trimmed it. If your hair is reasonably healthy , you just take good care of it, keeping them clean, hydrated and nourished with the right shampoos and products.
But suppose that you ,alas,have really crappy hear that break off right away and refuse to grow.... Get extensions. They change your look very visibly, but cost way way less than surgery- and if you don't like them any more, you can easily take them off and go back to natural.
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 November 2010): But you will live your life with a lie. When you see people they dot see the real you. The real you doesn't get to grow old, the modified one does.
If you see this as an option rather than learning to love yourself you will see surgery as an answer then you will neve learn to overcome stuff you will just get it removed. This is a slippery slope tht is likely to lead to a very warped and shallow perspective.
I would say you shouldn't.
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A
female
reader, Crazygirl20 +, writes (30 November 2010):
Crazygirl20 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionAnd I have been trying to grow my hair for years but then I will do for a trim and the hairdresser takes too much off or messes it up and then Im back where I started and I always change my hairdresser, it really lowers my confidence when I have horrible hair.
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female
reader, Crazygirl20 +, writes (30 November 2010):
Crazygirl20 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank u for the comments and I have money saved and I dont want to look like everyone else, I still want to look like me but I want to look in the mirror and be comfortable with what I see, I want a nose job and an eye lift which I can have done at the same time, Im not doing it for anyone else but myself, its affecting how I am with people and my relationships, people say I am pretty but I dont believe them. I have felt like this for a while now. x
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female
reader, the_hidden_key  +, writes (30 November 2010):
it does sound like you have some self esteem/confidence possibly even self worth issues. You are insecure about your body how you look, which i think is pretty common these days. We are the harshes crttics on ourselves more than others. Putting ourselves on pedestials and expecting the best or better than others. I am a perfectionist so everyything about me has to be perfect, sadly it isn't so i pick at every negative and make it bigger.You might be doing this, you might not, idk.All i know is, is that i wanted this too, a year or so ago, i had my mind set on getting this done, I was actually hoping to get implants lol, because for my height my boobs seem unproportioned and everyone else seems to have normal sized ones. And thre are heaps of things i'm insecure about, but in that way, these little thhings make me, me. I am begging to slowly accept myself.You see my getting surgery done, not only is it hugely expensive, and once you get it done you have to keep getting it done otherwisse it looks way worse, you know that right?so you need heaps of money, but you making yourself look like all those with that look, like a clone of someoen else, and you should try to express your indivuality not supress it,You should celebrate being youHeres an idea, try and get a piece of paper, and write down all the things you like about yourself, stick it on your wall, or something and everytime you wal past that all, pick something and repeat it over and over to yourselfrepitition is the keyif there are things you can do like exercise to tone up and stuff then do that, make a conscious effort. it doesn't hurt to exercise it only mkaes you healthier, and it releases endorphins which is like the happy, stress releiving chemical or whaever it is.The thing is with most media like models and such, they use heapsa make up and the images are photo shopped so that any blemmish or imperfection is taken away, thats not what they really look like its just how they want you to look like, remember there is a difference.but be nicer to yourself, try to be less hard on yourself, try different hair styles or make up or not, to mix things up a bit for you, to see what you like.retail therapy is always good, loli'm not going to say ohh you have your health you should be think of ppl that dont, because that is kinda condescending and doesnt really help, i know the feeling and am in the same boat so i know the feelings, ssadlyi hope my response hasn't been too lengthy lo, but i just hope i've helped in some way
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 November 2010): It's easy to feel like that but just remember some people don't even get to eat every day, that don't live in proper houses and live in slums. Put things in perspective, hey, if your healthy and confident I can guarentee you will feel better about your body and face
X
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A
female
reader, DrPsych +, writes (29 November 2010):
 I think lots of young women have insecurity about their body in some way. Lets face it, you cannot read a magazine or newspaper or look at the TV without someone dictating how women should look. Your dislike of your personal appearance maybe the result of clinical depression. This is incredibly common. To feel better, you need to see a doctor and identify why you feel so badly about yourself. Seeing a cosmetic surgeon is only a temporary fix to your feelings. Cosmetic surgery can be incredibly addictive as well as very expensive. You could end up looking like one of those Hollywood zombies who have had just about everything snipped and tucked. You can do a lot to improve your appearance without needing to go into an operating theatre. Perhaps one thing you ought to consider is seeing a style consultant. These are people who can advise you on what suits you - hair, clothing etc. However, this should be secondary to seeing a doctor and finding out why you feel the way you do.
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female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (29 November 2010):
 You need to get a handle on this. Even if you have surgery done and you think "Wow, don't I look great!" one day many years from now you'll be looking in that mirror and you'll say "Hell Mom! What are you doing in there?". Self-esteem lasts and in fact grows, it helps you out when everything else shrinks and sags.
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 November 2010): What do you want to get? Some is ok. But it shouldn't be because you hate your look it should be more about highlighting what you love!
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 November 2010): I used to feel the same way about things. What you have to do is to lose all sense of insecurity. What i did was i spent a while looking into the mirror, and i thought too myself, im not amazing looking (I mean, no one compares to these stunning supermodels these days) but im beautiful. You just have too look into the mirror, and tell yourself that your beautiful. Start to feel better about yourself. Too feel more liberated. After all, lifes too short too be worrying about looks.
You need to do this in order to be happy with yourself. I did, and i am.
Hope this helps. good luck!
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