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I really really like this girl and I think she likes me too. How do I know if the feeling's mutual?

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Question - (11 February 2007) 3 Answers - (Newest, 12 February 2007)
A female United States age 36-40, *ez writes:

I am terribly confused. I don't even know how to start. I think I am falling for a friend? We talk pretty much everyday. I've never been the type of person to talk to anybody the way I talk to her. We talk about everything/anything, we share things we wouldn't tell any random person. It's been a month and a half of this and I feel anxious if I don't talk to her. (The initiation of convos is mutual)

We are pretty busy during the week yet we still communicate, someway or another. We clear our schedules on a day, and we go out by ourselves even though we could invite other friends we have in common. When I see her, I feel at peace and sometimes I just want to sit there...hugging her. Is this "normal"? Is it plutonic? What should I do? What should I do to figure out if she's going thru something similar to me?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (12 February 2007):

i know how you feel. i too am in love with my friend. we too speak on the phone a lot and have never really met. i dont know how he feels for me, and i would love to know.

the guy i'm in lobe with, once said to 'if you want something so bad, you can get, you just have to try and get'. however, i do want him so badly, but i dont have the courage to tell him.

i think if you feel that there something there, and you can take a risk, then take it. you might think i'm a hypocrite coz i dont follow my own advice, everyone is different and you know whats best for you.

good luck. would love to hear a follow up xx

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A female reader, cd206 United Kingdom +, writes (11 February 2007):

cd206 agony auntIn my experience any friend couples that contain a girl and a boy inevitably have a certain amount of sexual tension between them by the time they get to your age. However the only way to know if she feels the same way as you is to ask her. You're lucky because she's your friend so you won't be uncomfortable and also, because of your age, even if she's not interested you're both adults and can go back to being friends easily.

CD

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A male reader, kenny United Kingdom +, writes (11 February 2007):

kenny agony auntIm going through a similar sort of thing with a girl i really like too.

I would say start off with some light flirting, like eye contact, touching ect. If any of this is reciprocated then this is your green light.

You pretty much know straight away if someone is into your or not.

If you look into her eyes, and she returns your gaze i would say that she is feeling the same things as you are.

Good luck

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