A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Hi; I am 45 and have been single for almost 19yrs. Everyone says I am a great person and very good looking. But my friends also say that I am needy and clingy. How do I stop being so needy and clingy? My thought were the reason was because when I was 7 yrs old my brother died and was buried on my birthday and then a month later I was molested and then a month after that I was molested again by a different man. Anyone that has a father that is in the military knows what they are like. Extremely strict and nothing is good enough for them. I got alot of smacks in the head for stupid things. Which is probally why I ended up with Epilepsy. Also had to make my bed till I could bounce a quarter off it. Life hasn't been the easiest growing up. Then after becomeing a adult I had 7 miscarriages and a tubal pregnancy. So figure maybe there is a way that someone can helpgive me any advise it would be much appreciated.
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female
reader, Denise32  +, writes (28 January 2011):
 Well, sorry to hear you have had quite a difficult life.
How not to be needy and clingy? Well, for starters, put yourself first and don't go overboard trying to please others or conform to their ideas of how you should live. be involved in activities and interests that are meaningful to YOU and that grab your attention. Look after your health by eating and sleeping right, exercising; choosing clothes/makeup that look good on you. Engage in some volunteer work to help others - maybe someone elderly you know? who would truly appreciate a bit of attention.
If you don't have a counselor or therapist, consider finding one to work with in resolving and healing your issues and recognizing your own self-worth.
Good luck!
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