A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: Hi Everyone.I have a question about whether or not to show that I like my T.A. (teacher's assistant for those of you who don't know). I am a senior in college and he is a Ph.d student. I am 23 and he is 28. (Oh, I know this because I Googled him ;-) )Class started just a few weeks ago but over the few weeks I have grown to really admire him. We have a lot of things in common, although he doesn't know this because our discussions are in the classroom and only about class material. I know we have things in common because I read his profile online and found some of his academic work online.Here's the rub: I think he likes me, or at least finds me attractive. But, he is the very shy and sort of socially awkward type. He also takes his job as a T.A. very seriously, so I feel that showing him I liked him might create discomfort but then again maybe it would be welcomed.I am not sure if I should subtly show that I like him or hope and wait that he gets the courage to say something at some point, that might have to wait until after the class ends. What do you guys think?
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female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (11 September 2009):
If he's shy and socially awkward as you describe, then there's a chance that nothing will ever happen unless you do something. So flirting may not be the best approach in the classroom setting unless you are VERY subtle, and even in that case he probably wouldn't get the hint. So I think BadAsh had a good suggestion of maybe talking to him about the class and even asking him for "extra help" or whatever you see fit outside of the classroom. That way while he's helping you with your work you can get to know him a little better and maybe do some flirting then.
A
female
reader, BadAsh6705 +, writes (11 September 2009):
I would say you need to find out somehow if it might make him uncomfortable before you outright flirt or anything because he might find it inappropriate in the classroom. Maybe if you have some questions about something from class you can see if he will meet with you. Then you can have a minute alone and see how he acts around you. I don't think it would be out of line to invite him to meet sometime other than at school, but just don't try to hit on him in class-it may make you look bad.
I had kind of a similar situation recently. There was a guy I was attracted to who worked basically next door to where I worked and he came in pretty frequently. I debated whether or not to flirt with him in that situation because he was a customer, so I did not want to make him feel uncomfortable if he wasn't interested. I think he could kind of tell anyways! lol
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