A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:This is an urgent problem and I, in advance, honestly and deeply thank you for your help. So, basically, the problem is - I'm in love with a guy I've practically never met and he happens to be my best friend's best friend ( my best friend's a girl). Okay, so the story goes something like this... They met about a year ago, while working on a science project, he lived and stil lives in a different town. After spending a couple of days together, they somehow realised they had hell a lot of things in common, but with a complete lack of sexual/any kind of romantic attraction, which I first found very strange, but it's really like that, they behave like siblings ( plus she loves her boyfriend more than anything). As the relationship progressed, she started telling me every little thing about him, but literally everything! His interests, his life story, his goals, ex girlfriends... Not only because we've been best friends for 15 years, and she tells me a lot of things about her life, but because he's such an amazing and exciting person, who, according to her, is a pure essence of goodness in this world. On the other hand, he knows I'm her best friend, but as much as I'm smart, funny, interesting or nice, that's not new to her and she doesn't have the need to tell him all about it, and I hope you get me here. They see each other every weekend, but I shall underline this again, with not romantic intentions. I've actually met him once, about six months ago, but I don't think I've made such a good impression on him, because I was with my ex boyfriend who happens to be such a jerk(I was just very blinded back then, and not in a good period of my life), and the guy knows my ex boyfriend. He added me on Facebook, we like each other's posts, but we've never talked on it. To end this saga, the core of the problem is that I don't know how to approach him. I feel stupid, because this is not rational behaviour, I shouldn't feel like this and I don't know how to confess it to my best friend. Can these things happen and what should I do about it?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2014): It's not an impossible scenario.
Just tell your best friend that you really like the things you've heard about him from her and that you think you kinda like him (don't make a major deal of it and don't say the word love once), she'll give her opinion and no doubt pass on the message to him, girls love to gossip and if she's close with this guy then she'll no doubt tell him.
Once it's settled and you know she's cool with it, talk to him about it, ask to meet up as friends or something and see where it goes.
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