A
male
,
anonymous
writes: ok so im an 18 year old male and I really really like an older girl. In fact shes 23.....I can't seem to think that there is this chemistry between us but this age thing seems a "taboo" to her. WE get along great we are the best of friends and I know that there is something deeper than "lust". We joke flirt ect. but I belive that shes tooo afraid because of my age. She has stated tha she wouldn't mind "kissing me" but then again its only a kiss, its not sex. Also I would like to state that I am still a virgin.... maybe I'm attracted to her not just because of her personality but because I am inexperianced and she is......... Please help or tlell me what to do so I can convince her that this is actually a good thing not something to be forgoten over a stupid think like age. Anyways if you could help that would be great.
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female
reader, mystify +, writes (3 January 2006):
hi ,
i am a girl of 26 married to a guy of 19, and yeah it totallly freaks me out! not so much for now in fact when it comes down to it im the one that gets id'd when out and everyone tginks hes older but what worries me is that when i turn 40 he will only be 32 (young enough to get away with dating a 19 year old!) thats more than 20 years younger than ill be!
so maybe this would put her worries into perspective for you, on the other hand my mums husband is 11 years younger than her , nearer to my age! and they have no worries.
if she wouldnt mind kissing you start there, get to know her let her get to know you , if its meant to be she will overcome her worries in time
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 January 2006): Dont worry I think its normal for a gal to worry about being with a younger man.If its there she will get over the age thing.My partner is 18 and I am 24.We have been a happy couple for two years now but in the begining it really freaked me out that he was younger.i dont think about age that much anymore he is just a guy and im just a gal in fact it comes as a shock when the age thing gets mentioned as i said i dont really think of it.Basically im trying to say it should be no barrier,older men date younger women all the time and noone bats an eyelid,that should work both ways.Take it slowly and let her lead and good luck to you both in the future
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (31 December 2005): It sounds like you've got something good here, and in my experience age really shouldn't be made a big deal. If you two have got a good relationship so far as friends, then build on that. Talk lots. talk about your opinions on anything and everything - talk about life, talk about your plans, and just show her that you are the guy who is going to be there for her. Don't move too fast, but at the same time be confident and try to express how you feel to her. Try sitting down one evening with her to share a bottle of wine, maybe playing a few card games- odd, but that's how i realised the girl i had been hanging out with had feelings for me too. I was 19 at the time, and she was 26. We have a great relationship, and we both hardly notice the age thing.
Good luck mate :-)
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A
female
reader, Angel Underneath +, writes (29 December 2005):
Maybe its not the age and she just wants to take things slowly. I'd move in for the kiss and see how things go
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A
female
reader, Tinkz +, writes (29 December 2005):
Unfortunately thats something you have no control of, her decision not to get with you is something she has decided.
What you can do however is show her how mature you are, talk about your future plans, what you have in mind for YOURSELF! Don't push her to hard because you may just push her away.
Thats how i ended up with my boyfriend and he's 18 and i'm 21.
If you do get to kiss her, make it passionate something she will never forget and you'll be surprised what a small kiss could do to a girls heart!
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