A
male
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:There's this girl I work with and I really like her.We've hung out a few times with other friends, but I don't know if she likes me the same way cause she'll tell me that we're just friends but her body language says different. We play around with each other a lot but she will find a way to get close to me or accidentally bump into me. I want to pour my heart out to her, but I don't know when would be the right time cause I don't want to ruin anything between us. What should I do?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 November 2018): To all who've answered on this question, you all need to UNDERSTAND that it DON'T MATTER if they work together or not.
In regards to the situation, if you truly believe someday you two will be together then go for it, if she still says no, at least you guys would still be friends and have fun together.
Again people, please stop faulting people for having feelings.
People ask questions for advice not harsh criticism
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (20 November 2018):
 You need to LISTEN with your ears, not your dick (pardon the frankness).
She has TOLD you that she sees you as a FRIEND only, which might be why she feels comfortable enough to goof around with you, because she thinks YOU see her as a friend ONLY as well.
Banter and even light flirtation IS NOT the same as interest in dating or anything else.
You CAN declare your feelings to her, but I think she will reject you and then you have a whole lot of AWKWARDNESS at work.
The work place is NOT a dating site. It's not a place for romance. You go there to work, for which you are paid.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 November 2018): Typo correction:
"If they are totally oblivious, or don't share the same kind of feelings; you'll put them on the spot."
P.S.
"You say no, but your body says yes!" That's how a tool thinks! A real dick!
Using shock-value or springing things on people is a bad approach. It's manipulative, and a way of trying to corner someone through passive-aggressive behavior. Apparently you've tried to cross the line, and she had to remind you that you're just friends!
If you'll politely ask for a date, it will suggest that you may have different intentions. Leaving it up to her to approve or decline the offer. Then you have to be mature enough to accept her answer, and go back to being friendly; but always treating her with respect. Stay polite and professional at work, regardless.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 November 2018): If she tells you you're only friends, listen to what she says.
As a male, teach yourself to believe what a woman tells you when she establishes boundaries or defines how she wishes to be treated. You are reading more into body-language than what she has told you. Know the difference between what is happening and wishful-thinking. It might get you into trouble! Take the word "no" to mean NO! Even if it only seems implied.
Here's the problem with telling people you crush on exactly how you feel. If they are they are totally oblivious, or don't share the same kind of feelings; you put them on the spot. They end-up rejecting you and hurting your feelings.
The shock of surprise might not get a good reaction.
Treat her like a friend. If you have the courage, ask her if she'd like to go on a date? That tells her you're interested without putting too much out there. If she declines, remain friends; or keep your distance. You work together and making things awkward at work might get you fired.
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (20 November 2018):
 You don't pour out your heart to anyone you don't know well. You are young and full of hormones, it is easy to feel strongly towards the opposite sex but it is all in your imagination. You keep it casual by mentioning something you would like to do together next time. Before you have that confidence, maybe hang out with her and other friends a few more times just to make sure. Because even when some people like to flirt, it doesn't necessarily mean they want a relationship, or one with you. You may want to ask her general questions about life and her status first.
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