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I really like a girl who hates me

Tagged as: Dating, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (24 June 2007) 32 Answers - (Newest, 29 May 2012)
A male United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I'm 16 and I fancy this girl who is 14 goin on 15 and she hates me so much but I love her and I cant get over her, she knows how I feel as all my freinds asked her out for me even tho I did'nt give them permission. I just got a gym membership so I can get in shape to impress her thats how desperate I am. I have lots of spots and have never went out with a girl before ever nt even a little kiss you have help me please tell me how to get a girl who hates you to love you

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A reader, anonymous, writes (29 May 2012):

ok its simple just be u and be happy

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A female reader, Miamine United Kingdom +, writes (13 February 2012):

Miamine agony auntMany of the aunts will have moved on, but I'll give it a try

First 2 and a half hours isn't that long.. calm down, you don't want to look obsessed. Maybe she is busy with something else. If she doesn't get back to you, then text back in a couple of days.

Second.. SPEED DATING!!!!! Not funny. Don't mention any possibility of dating anyone if you want to talk to a girl. She heard speed dating, thought your not serious and your only looking for sex, so she might have run off. That was very damaging to her ego, even if it was a joke.

Wait two days and text again.. hope other aunts have got better ideas on how you can fix this.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2012):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

hey guys not been on here for years I've improved massively and my confidence is now sky high! but maybe you can help me here met a stunnin irish girl on friday night and she asked me out on saturday night unfortunatly I was at a restaurant with my parents so couldnt meet up so I flirted with text that night then done nothing sunday and today I went for organising a date:

me: hey hows university going? had to be up at 6am for gym this morning felt like death! xxxx

hb:hey uni is okay....what you doing today ? ah gutted! am going to the gym after uni today xoxo

me:oh yeah what gym are you at? I've been helping my freind train for a marathon hate the early mornings Xxxx

hb: I go to the uni 1 oh gutted good luck! xo

me:decent I heard they have a great swimming pool. I go to the rubbish gym cause its cheap haha you coming out with me on wednsday or thursday night? I got invited to speed dating and need a way out lol Xxx

she hasnt replied in 2 n a half hours I'm not stressing just point out where I've went wrong.

Thanks

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A reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2012):

Why does she hate you? Listen, I loved this guy and he rejected me so basically I ignored him. Everyone thinks I hate him, but I don't; I'm scared of him. A heart can only be repaired so many times. I just recently started talking to him again though, because he kept trying to contact me. Just keep at it and ask her if there's anything you can do to make her happy.

Whatever you do, don't listen to this idiot;

"Ok. Totally ignore her for a month. This will make her go crazy and eventually come to you. Then play hard to get. Act totally uninterested. Then slowly get closer to her."

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A male reader, the player United States +, writes (8 December 2011):

I have been like this atleast 7 times. IT WILL NEVER HAPPEN GIVE IT UP!!! TRUST ME!

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A male reader, nehcmuab United States +, writes (8 October 2011):

ive tryed

#1 dont argue with girls they will hate you

#2 dont piss off their parents doesnt work out well

#3 be nice to people dont be an ass

i learned all of these the hard way

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (19 April 2011):

You need to tell her sorry for whatever you did and be confident girls love confidence so don't I repeat don't let your friends ask her out for you! Good luck!:-)

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A reader, anonymous, writes (9 April 2011):

If she hates you , she likes you .

If she likes you , she actually hates you.

The gym membership thing , yeah i tried signing up for gym too.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2011):

ano where your coming from, i went out with this girl for a short time and i came to love her, then she ended it and everytime we talked we just argued, i talk to some of her friends about but whatever you do, sort your problems with her out personally, dont get anyone else to get involved and talk to her, it only makes things worse. im still in the process to try win her back. just give her some space and leave her alone for a couple of days? best thing to do is let the situation calm down a bit. after a while talk to her casually and let your friendship grow, after yous are close, be confident and ask her out?

good luck, hope you get with her :)

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A female reader, bugaboo9842 United States +, writes (6 January 2011):

I think that you should be you'r self. This is coming from a girl my friend is having this problom and i'm helping him.

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A male reader, A.R.K Pakistan +, writes (28 October 2010):

DUDE!!!! no use..... girls who hate u hate u forever.. she wont ever like u.. beleieve me... im been in this problem twice... its really painful.... just leave her and move on! get another girl who likes u..:)

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (8 September 2010):

don't have your friends ask her out for you girls hate that

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A reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2010):

Well, first of all, all your friends asked her out for you, which means you have no courage, don't act desperate either, it basically ruins everything. Just say you're sorry for anything you did, girls like that. Then maybe when you get to kind if know her(you gotta be her friend first) ask her out and There is an 80% chance you will win her heart.

P.S.-girls like it when you make them feel special

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A male reader, bandiy United Kingdom +, writes (19 June 2010):

to get the girl you have to meet with her in an empty space and the slowly try to kiss her.

its the only way me and my wife are married

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A male reader, aysean United Kingdom +, writes (1 May 2010):

hello mate i have the same problem eexcept i have learnt a thing or 2 one she is not the onealso i can help thinking she the one saying no its her friends 2 my mates are asking her and she say no because she doesn't want to be the school gossip so the best thing to do is

1)keep control of your spot the best way your happy with

2)keep hygene at a top girl want boys to be clean and fresh

3)be you self girl don't like a person that tries to be a somebody

4)if you see he just smile don't say anything

5)speak to her friends if you need to make a fke facebook account and speak to them that way

6)top thing DO NOT be unfaithfull girl hate that aloways tell the truth

7)compare each other by yourself i.e do you have the same hair colour or do you say the same thing or get into a quick temper that type of thing

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A male reader, emporio2 Indonesia +, writes (12 December 2009):

did u do somthing to upset her

if u did confront her confidently say sorrry frowhatever u did if anythign and if u dont know just wiat for her to coem to you or do some snooping around, get to know her frinds and why sh doesnt like you

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2009):

i had the same problem. there was this girl that hated me but no matter how much i tried she wouldn't go out with with me. here is the answer. don't try so hard. back off for a while. let her see that your over her then she'll come to you.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (10 June 2009):

....same problem... except i am good friends with her best friends... and for me its getting in the way... but, good luck to you

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A male reader, alexisbeast United States +, writes (7 June 2009):

yo im in the same boat, i really like this girl who i was friends with and when i asked her out she sed she hated me but i know she was just embaresed just try talking to her

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A reader, anonymous, writes (11 May 2009):

I know where you are coming from! I am in the same situation. Good Luck.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (15 April 2009):

Well if really hate you then there's 2 things you can do not love her anymore or tell to plz give you one chance in order to get a girl to like you try to talk to her find times when she alone and sit down and say hi you know wat r u doing etc just make a long subject listen too her more talk less and give replies when she like " right " and u yea

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A male reader, anonboy United Kingdom +, writes (14 April 2009):

just talk to her if you have msn add her and just talk about stuff if you dont know what to talk about add her on myspace facebook etc and read her about me bit you will be able to find things about her then that you can talk about such as if her favourite food is pizza drop something into the conversation like my uncle has a chip shop their preety discusting but i like pizza more than chips whats your favourite food and always remember you can just say hi but dont do it when all her mates are there just one night one msn say hi how are you and if she says loads of shit just listen and say ur always there for her but dont be to pedoey it might take one month 2 3 or even a year but will be a friend she can trust then do something really CORNY it might sound silly but girls love it and as for your spots dont worry there is lots of brands you can use such as clearasil oxy10 quinederm if you have acne you can atchully go to the doctor and get a special thing but alot of people dont know this and dont be afraid to go i know it might be sad but go with your mum if you have to noone from school has to know do they

good luck anonboy

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A male reader, dominion United States +, writes (8 March 2009):

im in the same situation right now, you need to first find the specifics. why she hates you, why you like her, and what can make her like you.

in the end your not changing yourself for her, but to be with her

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (29 October 2008):

Exact same problem I hope it works out for you because im 99% sure i wont be so lucky i feel ur pain

peace

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (29 October 2008):

I TOTALLY understand where you are coming from. I had the same problem, 'cept she was a few months older than me. Believe me, I tried EVERYTHING, from sport to writing poetry and songs, and you might well do so, but if she doesn't like you (or in my case, and I quote, "hate[d] [my] guts"), then there, in short, isn't much you can do about it. My best advice is: write something cathartic. It doesn't matter if you are a good writer or not, just do it. Get everything about the matter out on paper, and if you are insecure about it, burn it or eat it or something. The point is, write absolutely EVERYTHING about this whole matter down, from what makes you feel that about her to what has happened in reaction from friends, and more importantly, her. Write it all down, and think it over for a while. If you get it all out, it can make you feel a lot better. If you do try and buff yourself up, which I don't advise as you shouldn't change yourself over her, see if you get a reaction, or any change at all, from her. If you don't, just try and stop thinking about her. Try and talk to her, be friends, but make it clear that you aren't doing it for relationship purposes. I hope this helps you.

~Lexodus~

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2008):

First, find out why she hates you.Then find a way to fix that and if she is the type that hates you for who you are...then she isn't the one you should be with.Also, if she's like that even if she loves you it's a high possiblity that the relationship wont last long.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (20 October 2008):

bro this is kinda wierd! dont put your self through all that. she is prob not even worth all the work your putting in. just go up to her and tell her that im sorry if you hate me but if theres anything i can do to change your mind please tell me. if she says theres nothing then let it be...

i know giving up is hard but sometimes its the best option

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A male reader, CYPRUSDRGN200x Canada +, writes (11 October 2008):

hey there. you can't *get* a girl to like you. you will meet someone special and it will just click. it takes time, that's the hardest part but keep moving forward and when it does click you'll know it was worth the wait.

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A female reader, JZ101EDMONDS United States +, writes (2 June 2008):

I'm going through a very similar situation except the girl's sixteen going on seventeen and I'm fifteen going on sixteen. The girl told me to leave her alone which is a pretty bad signal meaning now she wants nothing to do with you. If this girl doesn't want you or is not showing any signs that she's interested then I would just give up it's as simple as that.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (20 March 2008):

Ok. Totally ignore her for a month. This will make her go crazy and eventually come to you. Then play hard to get. Act totally uninterested. Then slowly get closer to her

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A female reader, YummyMummy United Kingdom +, writes (24 June 2007):

YummyMummy agony auntDon't change who you are for this girl. I understand the whole thing of impressing a member of the opposite sex and stuff but remember to stay who you are.

Why does this girl hate you? And why do you think going to the gym is going to change how she looks at you? Have you tried going to the doctors for your acne/spots? I did when I was in my teens and was given some medication that helped keep them at bay.

If this girl really hates you then she may not be the one for you. Don't worry about not kissing a girl at 16. It'll happen one day :)

xxxxxxxxxxx

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A female reader, myp United States +, writes (24 June 2007):

myp agony auntWhy does she hate you? First off you cant make her love you, she either will or she wont. Second off you have to get her to stop hating you then you have to get her to like you then you have to get into a relationship then you get her to fall for you. Sometimes people get lucky and they just skip to the love part others have to go through the slow greuling process of dating. Be yourself, i say that all the time to my guy friends, and they dont belive me, but its true. Dont stalk her or drool, or be bothersome. Act like you dont care she knows you like her, be confident in yourself. Confidence is the sexiest thing.

and again i repeat

Why does she hate you?

-Myesha

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