A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i watch gay porn. i really enjoy it but feel bad about it and scared. but i also feel feelings for girls and feeling them! what do i do? am i really gay? or bi ?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 July 2008): Hi, enjoyed reading your query and the replies. I would agree most with the one who stated in essence, you become what your choices dictate. Try to think long-term as you make your choice to continue to entertain yourself and your thoughts, and if your best friend would observe you, is this something you would continue doing? Yep, you have plenty of time, and work on your character as a person and the rest will fall into place as life continues. I wish you well!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks Alot! This has really built up my cofidence and now know how to take things as life goes on :D Thanks Again.
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A
male
reader, OhLawdWhat DoIDo +, writes (10 July 2008):
 Just something to keep in mind. Nobody is ever 100% straight or 100% gay, I think everyone is somewhere in a grey area between the two and this can change. The important thing is not to worry about it as you cannot help but be attracted to the people that you are and trying to supress your feelings will only leave you sadder. You are still very young and you will not be completely sure of your sexuality for many years yet. Try not to label yourself, labels are for soup cans yeah?
Chin up!
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A
female
reader, cherrybutton +, writes (10 July 2008):
dude your stil young. you've got your whole life to figure out wat u r, and the truth is ul prob never rly kno, unless your a luky 1. so take it easy!try watching uva porn too and just have fun wiv it. dont worry about labels as its only your bussiness. insted of wondering if you fancy girls or boys wait until you find a person you fancy and not be worried about gender. then it will al become clear. some ppl are 40, 50, 60 and stil confused, but at hey, twice the fun!!chin up babe
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 July 2008): Funny how you mention your liking for gay porn but at the same time have the urges for women. I'm 39 and as a young man (25yrs ago in high school) I've had 3 to 4 crushes on girls and the feeling of love for them and their companionship. I never really had a relationship with them but it came so naturally to me to feel that way. Later on through high school, my mind started to steer in the other direction. Things changed for me towards graduation year and eventually threw in the towel for women for the men. Since then, i never looked back and it felt like it was all a dream. Maybe you are bisexual, maybe you are not. My belief is, we were all born with the ability to absorb information and learn from them. It's like learning to tie your shoes for the first time. Some choose to learn the bunny ears and some choose to do the loop. Choices we make in our lives help to develop us individually. I figured/chose men. Plain and simple. They excite me, interest me and arouse me. Time will give you that opportunity to make choices which will lead you to an end result. Be happy with your decisions and don't let anyone say differently. You dictate your future.
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A
female
reader, PractiGal  +, writes (10 July 2008):
 You don't have to label yourself at all. Maybe, as time goes on, you'll come to identify yourself as generally straight with bi leanings, or maybe you'll decide you're actually only attracted to men. Or maybe you'll find that, when you get a bit of sexual experience, that you're actually only to women, or... whatever.My point is, that you don't have to make a decision about your sexuality, because it's already there. You'll find out what it is as you go.You might enjoy watching gay porn because you're gay, or bi. And that's fine if that's comfortable for you and feels right. Or you might also enjoy gay porn because watching men is less threatening to you than women are, at your current age. In your mid-teens, the other sex can seem mysterious and a little bit puzzling, even frightening. It could be that watching gay porn is something that feels less strange to you, because at least you know what men are thinking about and what it's like to be a horny man!Still, you probably should lay off watching exclusively gay porn, or at least cut it way back. There seems to be a possibility of getting 'hooked' on watching hardcore porn that can make it harder to enjoy silly, fumbling, awkward, fun sex with real people. There's also a school of thought that says watching too much porn warps your ideas of how sex is meant to be enjoyed in a caring relationship between equals. (Think about the way two actors in a porn video treat each other; it's like they're just shells. Too much of that can't be healthy for you!)Hope that this sheds some light for you...
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