A
male
age
36-40,
*unkyfabulous
writes:Ive been with my boyfriend for two years, i worked in a pub which he wasn't happy about, as customers flirt.so i gave up the pub, and together we decided to delete our internet profiles.however i found out he had created a new profile advertising himself as single and looking for sex, so i created a new one and caught him out.he says his reasoning for it is because customers flirted with me over the bar, and he felt insecure. However I had given up the bar job weeks previously, he still says he is insecure.i have finished with him but now feel lost. Do i forgive him? or will he still be looking at other guys?many thanks
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 September 2007): gay men are probably only as promiscous as many straight people, its wrong to generalise like that. A cheater is a cheater, male or female straight or gay.
A
male
reader, funkyfabulous +, writes (19 September 2007):
funkyfabulous is verified as being by the original poster of the questionsorry i didnt make myself clearer, I was not flirting with other guys on facebook, he thought i was through his own insecurites, so he created a gaydar profile advertising himself for sex, and saying he's single. i ahve never given him reason not to trust me.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2007): In my experience, a lot of gay men are promiscuous and cheaters. Can anyone explain why??
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A
female
reader, hlskitten +, writes (19 September 2007):
 Hi
This is crazy! why do you both need to be flirting with people on line anyway? facebook, profile sites? its ridiculous. When i get in a relationship, i lose the internet chat. There isnt enough hours in the day anyway!
I wouldnt give him another chance, its all childish crap but on both sides! Start a clean slate with someone thats ready for one person. I would delete profile sites if i was in a relationship, because i dont think people should need to be chatting to all n sundry that they dont know on the net, they should be using their energy on each other and real life friends.
Just my opinion.
C xxxxx
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2007): hey thanks for the advice, he has now said he was talking to other guys etc because i ahve a facebook account which he is mentioned on, and he has one too. he said he thought i was chatting to other guys so he did it too. Im at a loss, i love him and want to be with him but his trust issues are a major player in this. Ill keep ya posted
thanks again for the great advice.
xx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2007): It has to be your decision but i think you are well rid of him. If he is jealous over you working in a pub what would he be jealous over next? The list is endless. Jealousy is a really awful destructive thing to have, i know i have been on both ends of it. You need to stop thinking about him, because he would never change. Move on and you will meet someone who will let you be yourself without these negative vibes.
take care
xx
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A
female
reader, hotty +, writes (19 September 2007):
hello how are you? you need to make it clear to him that he is being quite selfish. you gave up your job for this man, which ultimately shows him that you are committed to this relationship and whats he done, put doubt in your mind. well sweety! you've shown him that your committed, now you have to show him that your not going to put up with this nonsense. its one thing to be insecure, but its damn right rude to be lying to the person your supposed to be intimate with. tell him your not prepared to put up with it and make him delete that profile in front of you. do something together that shows him and you how committed to each other you really are. if he refuses you need to find out why.
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A
female
reader, Ears4tears +, writes (19 September 2007):
 Hey huni,:)
Only you can decide whats best for you hun, but ask yourself this HOW FAR WOULD HE HAVE GONE if you hadnt of caught him out???? Do you think you could ever trust him again after what he did, he has showed a total lack of respect for you. Even after you proved your commintment to him by giving up your job, it wasnt enough to keep him faithful......... Do YOU really think that anythink you do will change that??!!!
Personally i think youd be better to find someone who accepts every part of your life and work with total trust in you,but whatever you decide it has to be best for only YOU!!
good luck xxxxx
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