A
female
age
36-40,
*sorock
writes:I have been with my boyfriend for 2years going into our 3rd. We have been living together for 2years straight.Last year he cheated on me with his ex-girlfriend and i forgave him. Earlier this year we went for an HIV test and discovered he was HIV+ and i wasnt. We established that he contracted it from his ex. I was heart broken but still stayed in the relationship as i love him to bits and feel he is the one.Things are great and we get on fine as he is on medication, however on xmas day his mother came to visit and he hid me in the bedroom till she left, that broke me. i have lived with him for 2years,taken care of him and he then he hides me from his mother.So i packed my bags and left as it seems he is also a commitment phobe as he hasnt proposed to me yet even after all we been through. He mentions me being his wife in passing but when i bring the marriage issue he runs around it dead scared to give me a time frame. So anyways i packed my bags and left his house, was it a harsh decision?
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cheated on me, ex girlfriend, his ex, hiv Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Abella  +, writes (27 December 2012):
 Your decision is not hard enough. If you stay with him there is a very high chance that he will give you HIV too.
He cheated and he risked your health. He hid you like he's ashamed of you.
Say Goodbye and never look back.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (27 December 2012):
 He cheated on you
he put you at risk for HIV
he lies to his family about you
he hides you (after a nearly 3 year relationship) from his mom
you packed your bags and left... GOOD FOR YOU.
do i think you were harsh? NO WAY.
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (27 December 2012):
 I think you did what is right for you. You know if you are unhappy or happy. Yes, this man could make you happy, if only this or that. If only he hadn't cheated, if only he wouldn't hide you from his mother, if only he would propose. But he is who he is and he does what he does. I think that by realizing you can not change a man, but accept him for who he is as he shows himself to you, you can also see if this is something that can make you happy or not. You accept that this is who he is, and thus you know you will not be happy, and you left.
In my opinion you made a good desicion. By staying you would only be fooling yourself. If he after living with you for two years needs to hide you from his mother, then I do not believe he intends to marry you any time soon.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (27 December 2012):
 Personally I don't think you were harsh at all. Two years in a live in relationship, less than that since he CHEATED on you and he hides you away like a dirty secret?
Oh excuse me!
Make a list of conditions he needs to comply with before you get back with him, including introducing you to his family as the woman he intends to marry, and make sure he completes them all.
If he doesn't 'get it' he doesn't get you, why should he, he has shown no respect, nor has he demonstrated his love for you, hiding you in the bedroom is not the action of a man in love.
Good luck!
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A
male
reader, scottmartinez2012 +, writes (27 December 2012):
 It's the perfect decision. you've been through a lot for him. But he doesn't value you. It was best for you to move. You seem like great girl to be with a guy even after all that. You deserve better. Hope you meet a guy soon who would love you the way you love..
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