A
female
age
36-40,
*inderellarockafella
writes: Hey, I seem to be asking for advice again... Me and my fella have been together over a year now and last time I wrote in we were bickering a lot... Now that has calmed down a bit but I now find myself feeling unsatisifed with my relationship... When we first met my boyfriend was the most romantic man I'd ever met and there was so much passion between us. But now that's faded. I know it doesn't last to the same degree forever but I think I should still get some of what we had. Now we sleep together maybe once a week which is not a lot considering we see each other at least 5-6 nights, I just don't feel special or wanted any more. I love him to bits and want to save our relationship but I'm not sure if I can... I've tried talking to him but I don't want to keep asking him to be nicer to me and sleep with me more because when he does these things I feel like he's only doing it to save the grief... Somebody help me???? Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (18 April 2009):
You have fallen into repetition. Placing your relationship on autopilot, hoping it will steer in the right direction. What might be happening is he's showing you love how he feels loved, which may not be the same way you feel wanted and appreciated.
The key is to find the key that unlocks that part of your partner. He needs to do the same. Some people feel loved by being bought something, taken someplace, being talked to a certain way, or being touched in a certain way. Once the key to that person is found, it's simple, just repeat.
Sit down with him. Tell him how you're feeling. Don't let it continue growing and making you feel unloved. Discuss the issues. Be non-judgmental if he has issues as well.
Remember that relationships aren't self maintaining. You want romance and excitement, it needs planned and executed. Fairy tales can come true if you desire, and it's planned then played out.
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