A
female
age
26-29,
*weetest_sin
writes:I am only 16 years old (please don't laugh) but when I was 12 I basically lied to my parents and went out with this boy. After a few slip-ups my Mom found out and she tried to forbid me not to be with him but I never listened to her much. This boy I think is my first love, we did so many things together (not that) and I knew that when I was sad he made me happy, he was there. Then some incidents occured which made our relationship bittersweet, I turned jealous and more insecure, the arguments started to arise and promises were made to make things better.When high school finished for us (we lived in the UK), my Dad was being transferred to another country, this boy knew this. We had a lot of miscommunication going on and I felt like I had to ask him to call me and skype with me etc. rather than him doing that himself...days before my flight, I asked him whether he wanted to say goodbye to me in person and just see my parents and see me off when I leave the country. He got really angry and started saying horrible things like: 'I don't wanna meet your parents, you traumatised me', 'yeah I did go round another girl's house before stop crying about it, it's not like you made it any easier for me', 'it's not like moving miles away would make a difference to us'...etc. etc. all I remember was I was really hurt and I kept telling him he was rude, he was insensitive, I was sorry but he was acting all cocky telling me to shut up at times, cursing, it really just switched me off. So I said that he should find someone who fits his standards because obviously I didn't do anything right in our relationship and I said that I couldn't believe he was doing this the night before my flight. So when I hung up, he text me 30 min later saying: 'Since I'm not brave enough to say it to your face, I hope you have a nice life and you find someone who isn't a d**** if you do find that nice guy, find me, I'd like to meet him'. I didn't reply. I told my Mom everything and she said that she knew that this would happen and that if he was serious about me, he wouldn't make up excuses and just do the nice things on his own, she said it's time to move on.The next day he sent me another few texts throughout the day saying, have a good trip, I wish I was there and before I hopped on that plane: 'Have a nice flight, I hope you get in touch soon, it's not gonna be the same without you.' No I love you's though, no I'm sorry's...so it's been 5 days since I left and every night when I'm alone in my room I end up thinking of him and all that we had. I tried not going on facebook but saw that he went trick or treating with his friends or something and just seeing all that activity, made me feel...I don't know confused? There were no more emails on my inbox of which I anticipated. Nothing at all.Inside although, I feel there is no shot of us ever being together, I am really hurting right now, because I cared about him a lot, what if he finds someone else who can make him happier? It'd really hurt me to see that :/ I know I'm young but what can I do to move on? Do I even owe him an explanation or is it pretty obvious? Do I just continue ignoring him and disappearing from internet and move on?
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female
reader, ScaredForLove  +, writes (5 November 2011):
Maybe; if you're unsure you should actually talk to him. But if you think you want NO connection whatsoever don't call or text, delete his number, and unfriend him on facebook that way you won't see anything about him doing ehat you like to do. Maybe go out and find new friends.? If he's still in your head then maybe you really love him and should talk to him.I really feel for you here :( . Good luck!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 November 2011): Sometimes people have no idea how much they hurt others by doing and saying horrible things like that. I fell in love for the first time at 17 and he treated me in a terrible way even though im marrying my fiance in a few months i think back.sometimez and wonder why did that boy do that to me!! What im trying to say is that there is no magic healer except for time. Life goes on hunny wether it feels like it or not. Go out and make some new friends and maybe in time a nice guy will come along and treat you better. As for this other boy. Go cold turkey. If looking on his facebook makes you unhappy dont do it. Remove him from your friend list if you have to. I wish you all the best hun and hope things work out. X
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A
male
reader, 3much4u +, writes (4 November 2011):
boys can be really insensitive sometimes, and one of the toughest things is breaking away and leaving your first love. When this first happened to me I cried for weeks (and I wasn't the type of guy who cried for anything) and the girl which broke up with me seemed so insensitive as well she was all over Facebook with other guys etc.. it made me feel even worse. Eventually I got over it, you just need time there no special advice or medicine or anything I can give, it just takes time, maybe a month or a few but eventually you will get over him,In my situation it took a few months then I met another amazing girl which made me completely forget about the first. One method I used is I avoided looking at pictures of her, and I avoided sad romance pop songs because they only made me feel sadder and think of her more.All you have to do is be patient.All the best.
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